I think this is a good clarification on Kino, and how to create that lasting, escalation type connection and keep it going. If you’re wondering what all this is about, go back and read Constant Kino and A Short Cut Through Kino Escalation. This is a followup to that post.
Here are some replies to that post from other forums. I’ll post them and my responces to help clear up any questions you lurkers and other guys might have had.
“Fascinating. I do have a few questions. So, what exactly do you mean by “constant” if you’re saying that it shouldn’t actually be constant? You need to touch her 50% of the time that you’re together, 90% but factor extra time when you’re not close enough to touch? Also, what type of touch would you recommend and in what proportion? Obviously you want to go easy on the sexy touch styles on non-sexy areas (slow and very lightly, regularly arrythmic, patterned pressure, etc. etc.). Comfortable touches like aren’t-we-awesome-friends would be the staple, but that’s a wide open field. Should your body language be more protective when you’re using this type of contact, or should you be more independent? What’s the objective in direct terms- is it to make the girl as comfortable as possible, or to make her enjoy your presence, or to feel intimate?
Good concept- I will use this.”
(I’m going to try to answer your questions, while also explaining it a little more.)
Sorry about the confusion, It should be constant… just not to the point where you are taking her everywhere you want to go…
Here’s the rule I use:
“If she’s close enough to touch her, I will.”
(Once you guys are comfortable with one another, you be the judge here (better to do than to think, assume attraction and comfort from the get go <someone that was right>)
By touch I mean ANY PART of my body is in CONTACT with any part of HER BODY.
I didn’t write my rule in the original post because I thought if some weird guy was reading it he’d be putting his weird paws all over a girl in weird ways and him not knowing what he’s doing is weeeird! Here’s a way to not be weird… be comfortable with being touched and be comfortable with touching a girl. Think of touch as “No big deal” and then you can start with the Constant Kino.
Ideally 100% of the time she’s in range and she’s being good. A lot of the time it just won’t seem right, like you just started hanging out with a girl and she’s giving you the not yet vibe. “Let’s see if you fit” or at most after about 30 minutes on the day 2 you should be very very close to having it 100%. (After car time if you drove together)
If you’re at a bar it’s really easy to get it. Try sitting with a set at a table and take up space… spread your legs while you’re sitting and have your legs/knees touching both girls in the set while you’re talking and listening to them talk; this sets up a neat interaction. Remember, it’s normal for YOU to be doing this. Not a rule; but to me it feels more natural to go Constant Kino on a re-open, if not on a day 2, on a day 2 she wants it Constant as much as you do.
You’ll also notice that even when you’re not talking directly to the girl even with the slightest form of this that the person will listen to you more intently, even if it’s been there for a few minutes.
Think of this, you’re at a table next to your target and in comes an interrupt or she starts talking to someone else. (Girls that are sitting are easier to pick up.) If your legs are spread and one of them is up against her leg, she knows you’re there and she likes the fact that it is touching her so why not let her talk to whomever she wants? You’re not claiming her; but it’s still decided. The fact that she doesn’t move the leg away should be enough for you to know. Stare Decisis <Latin for decision final or to stand by the decision> She’ll be back to you in a second if you were doing well before the interrupt. Now if some douche PUA (I’ll write PUA because natural or not he’s there to get your girl) comes into your set trying to impress his friends by swooping your chick and you feel that ignoring the guy isn’t in your best interest, proceed to normal befriending and if necessary AMOGing. (I like a combination of the both, sort of like push pull. <Swinggcat has a lot of good theory on push pull> Also note that a lot of the time these guys make great terrible wings). I’ve never had a real AMOG come into my sets, just douche’s. “Hey ladies can I buy you a drink?” … douche’s.
What type of touches would I recommend?
All kinds. You’re still going to have to escalate just keep it constant…
Aren’t-we-awesome-friends type touches?
I’ve never really hit the LJBF zone for too long, so yeah.
No, not unless you have to push her out of the way of a speeding bus or similar.
Yes definitely be independent. It shouldn’t bother you in the slightest if you see this as a playful game. I laugh when a girl wants me to stop; really, I chuckle and stop till later. If it’s getting late and the girl has been teasing me for an hour, I’ll get up and leave and say something like “this is too much for me, I’m gonna explode if I don’t leave” (a real take away, after all the little freeze outs <MM> then get up and leave. She’ll chase, I’ll give her one more chance for the full close, if she still doesn’t want to then maybe there’ll be a day 3. I haven’t gone past a day 3 without full monty since High school, I won’t. The real stuff happens after sex <All PUA’s to the best of my knowledge>
What’s the objective in direct terms?
I would say the point of this is to get her comfortable with touching you while at the same time having her actually like touching you. Pick up is two ways. You can then take it any direction you want by how you escalate the situation. La la la we like touching each other, Foreplay dry humping heavy petting with make outs, or experimental vibrating egg in her ass sex. It’s great for all types of relationships.
Thanks for your reply.
“I gotta be the one ask bro, but doesn’t that Lance Mason pickup 101 already teach this idea to ppl? I mean he doesn’t call it constant kino but his examples straight from the Cliff’s list videos suggest kinoing the chick with a HI-5 and then grabbing the hand and holding it while you talk. OR directing her attention to something at the same time as you kino her (arm around back or shoulders) and continue talking to get that kino going then keeping it. Your technique and what he teaches sound very similar except he sort of suggests that if you are congruent you can do it right away; in other words if you’re “that guy” who just seems to touch people naturally then you can start extended kino from the start with a little calibration.
His idea is Kino as much as you can as early as you can for extended periods with the occasional mysery throwoff or pushaway but done more playful as opposed to dicky.
So I guess Im wondering, is there a difference and what are they or is it just your way of explaining the concept?”
The idea behind this has been known for ever and a day. For me it started with PDA and my virginity girl back in High School… we always touched each other. Always. PDA couple of the world! People or not we were touching. Purpose or not, we were touching.
L Mason was onto something, and he’s probably pretty dope in field he most likely even uses Constant Kino; but I feel like his technique with the high five hand grab behind the back finger fan thing was made for flash, for students to say “WoW”, kind of like Mehow’s Pure Kino (both are awesome for demos)… I’m not talking smack here, these guys know their shit.
There is nothing spectacular about what I’m trying to explain here… I really don’t believe I’ve ever read or heard anything about this before. So you’re in set and for some reason your knees are touching this girl? So what? Not at all intrusive, nothing big going on, low pressure, you’re not facing the girl, she’s next to you, the only thing is, is your knee is touching her at all times.
In my last reply I almost wrote that Constant Kino is all touching without touching (w/o using your hands). Can you see what I’m saying here? I didn’t write that because the idea behind this is in the name, Constant Kino is all Kino, at ALL TIMES, keep it Constant. You still can do whatever kino you were doing before just always be doing some kind. I’ve never read anywhere to be in set and have the toes of your shoes touching while you converse.
The base line of this kind of Kino would probably be called Proximity Kino in community terms. But the idea behind what I’m writing is to always be, constantly, at least having Proximity Kino going on.
At the beginning of my original post I wrote that people have most likely been doing this naturally for years, like those old couples that always touch, affectionate or just proximity, they’re touching. (I used old people because they’re just so darn cute and they’ve been around longer than the community.
Picture this, you walk into a girls apartment and she has 4 friends over and they are all hanging all over each other leaning this way and that one has her leg over two others while another has her head in ones lap watching TV, I’ve seen this in real life on a Friday night, crazy. That is Constant Kino. They’re not trying to hook up with each other, they just love touch, that feeling of belonging.
Call it whatever you want, Extended Kino, Continuous Kino, Infinity Kino, I personally like Constant Kino… Like when it all boils down there is still this constant that is always there, constantly. Mainly this idea was and is for me, I’m just sharing it with the few that pay attention.
I wrote this hoping to help guys, not to invent something new. However, I don’t believe it’s ever been explained as clear as this before. I’ve been writing about Constant Kino on targets since my first LR a year and a half ago, there should be a quite a few mentions on the DPUA site.
Kino as much as you can as early as you can?
Sure; but I’m saying after 30 minutes it never stops.
Thanks for the reply.