Peter Grimm: Myths and Truths about Pickup

Hey there, I just wanted to introduce you to a long time friend and great wingman of mine named Peter Grimm.  He recently wrote a great post filled with some basic as well as advanced concepts.  As you guys know I like my discussions about Seduction  or Dating to be FIELD TESTED advice, and Peter brings a LOT of experience as well as success to the table.  I am excited about this post and I know you’re both find it a fun and informative read.

Here we go!

Peter Grimm: Myths and Truths about Pickup

First, let me introduce myself.  My name is Peter Grimm, I’m a good friend of Ronnie’s and was asked to join this group to lend a hand and help bring along some of the new guys who want to experience as much success with women as possible.

First, let me say, I applaud you guys for taking that leap – for dedicating yourselves, for putting yourselves and your egos out there for the sole purpose of grabbing life by the balls and getting the absolute most out of it.  I wish you all the success in the world and I sincerely hope that my experiences can help you speed up your growth and get you to where you want to be as quickly and painlessly as possible.

About me:  I’m nothing special.  I don’t have a silver tongue.  In fact, I’m a pretty quiet, introverted and reserved guy for the most part.  I’m not the center-of-attention pickup type you normally associate with this sort of thing.  I’m not rich either.  I don’t have a flashy job.  I’m a middle manager at an oil company, and my job bores women to tears.

That said, I have had quite a bit of success with women in my lifetime, particularly in the last couple years.  I lost track, but I believe my “count,” if you want to call it that, is somewhere around 200 women at the moment.  A good number of them are quite beautiful.  I am currently sleeping with seven beautiful women…. I would characterize it as I have that part of my life handled.

I don’t say any of that to brag, but rather to encourage you readers – I want you to know that if you really put your mind toward your goal of getting better with women, that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel and that you WILL find the success you are looking for.

How I did it was mainly trial and error.  I joined the Dallas Lair in 2008, and I was your typical newbie from that era running around with leather wrist cuffs, feather boas, bedazzled tshirts and 52 rings on my fingers, using canned openers straight out of The Game (hint: you don’t need that stuff).  I read everything under the sun, I took a couple bootcamps, and I went out constantly.  Like 4/5 days a week for a couple years.  I got better and eventually moderated the dallas lair for a little while, then I got burned out from lairs, got in and out of a couple serious relationships, and did my own thing for a while (still going out every weekend).

Anyway, enough about me.  Im gonna go ahead and post this, and below, I will do a writeup of my general thoughts about pickup and how I believe you should structure your learning in order to get good as fast as humanly possible, so you can start enjoying the success you deserve.

Where to begin. 

First of all, what you should know about pickup is that it’s EASY.  There is so much material and advice out there, one can easily get overwhelmed, but it shouldn’t be that way.  When you really break it down, the fundamentals and principles of meeting and sleeping with women (and everything between and after) are NOT complicated and can be easily understood by everyone.

Second, pickup is FUN.  Never lose sight of that.  Never view this as a job or a chore, you’re trying to get your rocks off… it’s not that serious, and it’s not the end of the world if you get blown out every now and then.  This is part of your life, a diversion, it’s not your WHOLE life.

Alright, now let’s get to some meat and potatoes.

Keep in mind that everything I post below is MY OPINION.  Based on MY EXPERIENCES.  It’s not gospel, and there are many ways to skin a cat.  If anyone disagrees with anything I write, that’s fine…. what works for me works for me…. but ultimately you each need to decide for yourselves what your beliefs and philosophies are going to be.

1.)  Myth #1:  Looks don’t matter.

You read this in almost every pickup book you’ll ever buy.  Sorry to burst your bubble, but this one is bullshit.  Looks absolutely do make a difference.  You’re just going to have to learn to accept that reality.  That’s not to say that ugly guys can’t get girls, or even hot girls, but the good looking guy is going to have a lot more chances.  Let me put it to you this way, using a baseball analogy.  An average guy is going to get three strikes before he’s out.  An ugly guy might get one.  A good looking guy will get many more chances to fuck up because the girl wants him to succeed.

Now if you’re thinking about getting discouraged…. DON’T.  Understand that what I mean by “looks” are 80% within your control.  Probably the biggest thing you can do to improve your game RIGHT NOW, which is why I put looks at #1 on my list, is IMPROVE YOUR BODY LANGUAGE.

Bold text alert:  THE SINGLE BIGGEST THING YOU CAN DO TO IMPROVE YOUR GAME TODAY, RIGHT NOW, IS TO IMPROVE YOUR BODY LANGUAGE.

Let that sink in and marinate.  And I don’t just mean the basics like stand up straight and don’t lean in.  That stuff is important too, but understand that body language is more important than the words that come out of your mouth.

To improve in that area…. practice, practice, practice.  Work on holding good, confident eye contact.  Work on getting rid of that nervous laugh, any nervous ticks, work on moving slowly and confidently.  Mimic actors… that might be the single best way to improve in this area.  Read books on the subject.  In other words, take the study seriously and dedicate time to it, it will pay dividends big time.

Work on your voice.  This one is simple, the deeper, louder, and less shrill your voice is, the more pussy you will slay.  So be mindful of it.  Take voice lessons if you need them.

Aside from body language, get to work on your body.  Eat right, and get your ass in the gym.  Nobody likes busting their ass in the gym but he who works hard plays hard.  It will make a difference with your well-being, and it will certainly make a difference with your success with women.  I’ll leave it at that.

Finally, dress to impress.  I find a marked difference in my success with women just based on how I dress that particular day.  Learn what fabrics and colors look good on you, find your own style, etc.  Again, there are a million different resources out there on how to dress nicely so I won’t go in to it now (if you want me to recommend some, just ask), but this one should be obvious:  pick up a woman’s magazine, and you’ll quickly realize how much clothing matters in the world of women.  It’s how they judge each other, and it’s how they’ll judge you.  It’s how you present yourself to the world, of course it matters.  It’s so easy to do this one right, to set yourself apart from 90% of men out there who dress downright sloppy and without any thought or effort… so just make up your mind to do it and reap the benefits.

To sum up:  I think physical game (looks, dress, body language, voice) account for easily over half of your success with women.  My personal view is that if you can get your physical game 100% down tight, which is just a matter of effort more than anything, then game from that point on becomes about JUST NOT FUCKING UP.

That’s right.  It’s not about dazzling her with your creative stories, your witty one-liners, your practiced openings…. if you get your physical game down tight you don’t need to do anything… everything else becomes a simple question of 1.) not falling in to newbie traps and 2.) Simple logistics.

2.)  Myth #2:  You need good openers to succeed in pickup.

Nope.  99% of women don’t even remember what you opened them with.  Here’s how this whole thing works.  When you open your mouth to begin talking to a woman, she automatically begins assessing you as a potential mate.  This is just automatic.  She’s checking boxes subconsciously in her head.

So the whole idea that you need some “excuse” to talk to her is contrary to basic biology and it puts you in a defensive state of mind, which is not attractive nor is it beneficial to you.

I only open women two ways:  1.)  Situational openers or 2.) Direct openers.  I personally prefer direct, but situational is more socially normal so it just happens more naturally at times (however, bear in mind that it’s always implied, even when you open situationally, that since she is a woman and you are a man, you are feeling each other out as potential partners.)

3.)  Myth #3….. picking up girls at bars is creepy/weird

It isn’t.  You’re a man, you’re attracted to women, it’s biology and it’s perfectly normal and never apologize for being attracted to a girl.

A word on “creepy.”  What is “creepy,” anyway?  You hear this from girls all the time when they’re talking about a guy they don’t like, “oh he’s creepy.”  What does that mean?

Creepy for a woman is a guy who is nervous, who hides his intentions.  The creepy guy leers and stares at the girl but doesn’t work up the courage to talk to her, or he mumbles and skirts around what he really wants, so that she’s left feeling afraid.

We fear what we don’t understand.  Make yourself easy to understand to women, and women won’t fear you, and you won’t creep them out.

So if you notice a hot girl and the thought that runs through your head is “my, what a hot girl,” then your next reaction should be to go up to her and say “I thought you looked really good and I wanted to come say hello.”  Do not use an indirect opener in this situation because she will sense the incongruency, that will cause anxiety, and it’s not productive for you.

Myth #4:  Negs don’t work. 

In the early days of the PUA community, negs were all the rage.  Then a school of thought came around that said negs are useless, you don’t need them, don’t bother incorporating them in to your game.

Well I’m here to tell you, and again this is my opinion, that negs absolutely do work, I don’t know where that contrarian school of thought came from, but yes they work and yes you should incorporate them in to your game.

And that brings us to the subject of validation:  one of the most important concepts in pickup and one that you should master in its entirety.

YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO SLEEP WITH A GIRL WHO ISN’T ACTIVELY TRYING TO PROVE HERSELF TO YOU.

Let that sink in, because it’s important.

In nearly every interaction between two people, one person is trying to validate themselves to another.  You need to remember two things:   a.) NEVER validate yourself to a woman and b.) ALWAYS be sure that she’s trying to validate herself to you.

This goes back to what I wrote about game being all about not fucking up:  If you start validating yourself to a woman, you can be Brad Pitt, but you’re not going to get laid.  NEVER, NEVER do it.

So there are two ways you can make a woman validate herself to you, which will ramp up her attraction toward you better than anything else I know….

a.)  neg her  (these should be subtle and NOT seen as insults.  Again, there are a lot of materials out there on how to properly neg so I won’t get in to it here.)   b.)  qualify her  (basically, give her a compliment to the tune of “I like how you XYZ, you’re different from other girls, most girls are completely not like that.”)

Use these and profit.

Myth #5:  You have to be the alpha male, center of attention, all the time.

Nope.  You don’t.  As long as she’s validating herself to you, then you’re more alpha than her, and that’s all you need for the emotional chemistry to work and for you to get some.

Every PUA goes through the “I must be more alpha than everyone, AMOG everyone, hand on the shoulder” stage in their career.  Shit, I was that guy for a while.  While it doesn’t hurt to be the leader, it certainly isn’t the end of the world if you aren’t.  Focus on the nuances of validation instead, that will get you a lot further in my opinion.

It won’t kill you with women if you’re a bossy asshole…that’s not what you’re being evaluated on… but your friendships might suffer.  Just a thought.

Myth #6:  The comfort stage is just about talking about yourself, I don’t need to study it.

Wrong!!  Game is won or lost in the comfort stage, I can’t stress that enough.  I don’t often recommend or push products, but one I can really recommend for this is Kezia Noble has a DVD about comfort… I can’t remember what it’s called now but it really breaks down what you need to do better than anything else I can remember reading.

In a nutshell, that stage of the game isn’t about talking about you.  It’s about getting her to open up about herself at a very deep level.  You want to get good at asking the right questions that will help you understand the thoughts and beliefs that make her who she is.

That’s the ultimate goal.  It’s not about you expressing yourself, it’s about you focusing your attention on her and helping her to express her belief system to you.

Pickup Artists are Creepy Wanna Be Rapists Who Hate Women – The Double Standard

Pickup Artists are widely considered people who use tactics and techniques to try and “manipulate” members of the opposite sex into bed.  Predatory, manipulative, rape culture, creepy…

Where else have we seen that before?

Popular Women’s Magazines perhaps?

Let’s completely overlook the ways women can look their sexiest, to attract men.  Forget all the fashion techniques, makeup, hair, pushup bras, bling etc.  Just ask a girl, they do all that for THEMSELVES..  Yeah, right…

But let’s look at some of these Mainstream Articles in these Popular women’s magazines.

Article Titles like:

Get Men to do your bidding without being a Nag

Get in his head and in his bed!

Christina Hendricks:  How she chased her man and got him!

How to disappear without a trace.

The Sex position that will Put a Ring on your Finger.

Football and poker will improve your relationship.  Find out how!

And a whole host of ways to manipulate men through sex.

It took me literally 3 minutes to pull of 3 random women’s magazine covers without even skimming for what the content of the covers would be.  Let me guess…  Women don’t read these magazines.  That’s how these magazines stay in business, and have stayed in business for so long.  That’s why advertisers spend a fortune advertising their products in these magazines. It’s because women don’t buy or read them…  😉

Am I complaining?  Am I saying there’s something wrong with all of this?  NOPE!  As a matter of fact, I am very far from the hypocritical crowd out there spouting out how men learning tactics and techniques or even just improving their lives inside and out is somehow creepy, misogynistic, women hating, rape culture.  If that were the case than women have been rapey, men hating, creepsters since before I was born.

No.  Men and women trying to become more attractive to the opposite sex is AWESOME!  It is NORMAL.  Why not?  But this double standard garbage has to stop.  Women and Men are playing the same game, and the fact is, the WOMEN have been making the rules for a long time.  In essence it is a woman’s game.  It is a beautiful game to play.  It’s just too bad some angry, jaded people, both men and women, are trying to project their own ignorance, and corrupted thinking on it.

Flirting is a dance.  It is very much so, in my opinion, an elegant, beautiful dance.  So if men and women want to learn some moves to become better dancers, Fantastic!!  But this double standard that what is great for women to do is evil for men to do just needs to be put to rest.

Sidecar:

OHH!!  Looks like I made a booboo, to the excitement and delight of one particular mangina and his blog of estrogen filled man-hating feminist followers.

A couple of the covers above, are from a parody article.  I guess just taking the first 3 covers at random and posting them in 3 minutes has it’s setbacks.  Silly me.

However, since responding beyond my only comment I left on his blog,

“If you came out of your mom’s basement, and unplugged from your attempt to win the favor of women by self-loathing you could go to any supermarket and look at any cover of any of these magazines and see how ridiculously wrong you are.

Cheers! :)”

…which is still awaiting moderation, I don’t think that this warrants the attention of another blog post.

But what I will do is take another 5 minutes of my life to give another blogger more to obsess over me about by taking hours of his day to look into every little detail of what I am about to post.  Funny how a creepy, stalkerish guy is so quick to recognize (project) his traits in others while spending hours trying to dissect my article.  Projection much?

Oh, and click this for the mangina post.

On a similar note.  Check out this article about other websites similar to the Mangina site above:

I am the Patriarchy – Mangina Sites

One last word.  Of COURSE the mangina’s article completely misses the point of this one.

Again, I think it is FABULOUS that men and women are trying to become more attractive to one another.  Men and women are not separate like the mangina site would have you believe.

In life there are a couple different schools of thought, if you will.

There are people who are separate.  Apart.

I’m old, you’re young.

I’m straight, you’re gay.

I’m Atheist, you’re religious.

He’s black, I’m white.

She’s a woman, I’m a man.

And on and on and on.

Separate – Apart.  That’s what mangina and his poor collection of readers live their lives like every day.

Then there are other people who like to think we are all in this together.  In the Taoist philosophy we all compliment one another.  Yin and Yang.  Darkness brings light.  High allows there to be low.  Valley and Mountain compliment each other as do the Seasons.

Men and women make wonderful dance partners so to speak.  We are all on THE SAME TEAM.  The human race.  There is no jaded battle between men and women other than from those who have completely lost their way.

Flirting, sexuality, seduction.  It’s a dance.  A beautiful, wonderful dance that life has gifted us the opportunity to participate in.  There is no Me vs You.  There is not US and THEM.  We are all in this together.

Fourty, Fit and Phenomenally Sexy

TSOD:

From a private forums « on: October 31, 2011, 10:28 PM »

I’ve been blah blah blahing away about lesbian seduction texting lately. And I promise you all I was going to try and save all my texts.

2 things happen when I try this method (mostly reserved for girls I am not getting enough positive response from quickly enough through text or phone.)

1.  She will break open and start texting me like she doesn’t care anymore about how you perceive her.  She will start talking and telling me how much she likes the way I express myself.  I can escalate quickly as hell.  How quickly?  We’ll talk about it below.

OR

2.  She will get creeped out or feel pressure to tell you she isn’t interested.  This will happen pretty quickly in most cases so now you can scrap the number and move on.  I like Risk Creepy and I LOVE reframing.  Girls that don’t respond well give me the chance to practice these things.

I just had a day2 yesterday.  This is what happened.  She texted me early on.

“You up?”

ME:  “Ya…”

Me:  “Thinking about going to get coffee…”

Her:  “Wait for me!”

and then I texted her my address.  She came over, we went and had coffee for a few minutes at Kickstand coffee.  We bantered a little.  The vibe was already there.  I was Lovable Sex Addict.  It was probably noon and I was at the coffeebar grabbing her fake boob and she was smiling and mock protesting at the same time, but it’s because I had kept blaming her.

As soon as I saw her dressed in her black hoodie with it unzipped to reveal fucking sexy cleavage with mouth watering lingerie cupping her breasts (no not completely out there…  I knew because I made great show of looking down at her boobs and commenting.) I was hard as a rock.

I can get away with this because we were already so dirty and sexy in text that it was just me being congruent.  It would have been weird if I wasn’t doing this.

However, it also worked because of Shock and Awe.  One of the first things I did when I saw her was zip up her zipper.  “That’s better…  I can’t be staring at your boobs the whole time…”

And, of course she unzipped it back down.  The dynamic works if you do it right.  I want her to feel sexual.  I want her to feel desired.  I want her to know she is seducing me and that I am fighting it.  It makes her want to do it more.  We talked about our tentatively scheduled day2.  We didn’t really have a day2 planned.  I just amped and amped and amped and made little light suggestions until she just had to come meet me.

We were actually supposed to go out tonight, not yesterday.

So after coffee we went to Whole Foods to drink a bottle of wine…  But not before we went back to my house, I sat on my chair, pulled her onto my lap, started making out with her.  I was purposely playing “Lesbian Porn Scene” in my mind.  In the scenes I’m referring to girls are always so polite about seducing other women.  They always ask, “Can I see your boobs?”  “Can I kiss it?”  “Do you mind if I…..?”

So I was doing this, exactly like this.  “Do you mind if I take your boob out?”  “Which one first?”  “Can I kiss it?”

I don’t know if any of this was necessary.  It was just for me.

Soon the bra was coming off and I stood up with her on my lap, her legs wrapped around me, and I carried her to my bedroom and gently laid her on the bed.  There we made out and I licked her all over and kissed her neck, which I knew she liked because of lesbian seduction texting.  Mainly:

Her:  O i know…theres nothing like soft lipz kissing and sucking on your neck slowly. Ughh

Her:  With one hand on nipples.  :*

This started from making a joke about her flaking on me.

She flaked so I told her something like, “That’s ok.  I’m actually glad you did.  I had  long night last night and am super tired today so thanks for cancelling!”

Then my next text was along the lines of, “I’ll just have to smack your ass next time I see you to make up for it.”

You have to go sexual.  You have to risk it.  If she flakes and internalizes it as, “I don’t want to see him.” or “I feel guilty for not going out with him.” or anything negative you’re done.  She’s gone.  So reframe flakes as, “Hahahaha! Thank God.  You must be a mind reader.  My friend wants to come over and cook me one of my favorite meals tonight (chick language for SOOO Much preselection).”  Something like that.  Then always follow up with another text.   Be risky.  Who cares.  At the very least say, “But you’ll have to make it up to me.”

So that started.  At certain times I just got worse and worse.  I think I went from 2 to 5 (smacks on her ass) and told her I had terrible math.  Then later in our texting I said I went to 15.  Then after she mock protested I dropped it to zero.

I really wish I would have saved the entire text exchange so you can see how this worked.  This text conversation started playfully then got just sexy as fuck.

The ones from her I saved as follows:

“Thats the real reason i didnt come, thought i’d rack up the spanks until i had a bunch.  Ha”

“Nooo.im going to bite your ass, kiss your neck and smack your lipz….. “(This is where it started to convert to lightly sexual to sexual sexual.  This was after a text where I said, “Actually I’m going to smack your ass, bite your neck and kiss your lips.”)

So I’m jumping around but that’s how I’m thinking right now.. So after kissing her on the neck I basically started removing parts of her clothes but NOT before I laid on my back and said, “you want to see it?”

“Ya!”

She already had a picture of my cock from the phone texting exchange where she demanded at one point I send her a picture.  It was soo cute too, because she was like, “Send me a picture.   I want to see it!”

Me: A picture of what?  😉

Her:  I want to see your Dick!!  No double standards! (she has already sent me a picture of one of her boobs and her pussy).

Me:  Hahaha.  I just wanted to hear you say it.

That got funny.  I do have a nice dick.  She Called me right after to tell me she had to stop the car.  “You have a really nice Weiner!”, she said in her sultry, sweet and innocently seductive voice.   Ok ok ok.  So if you talk to this girl she sounds like a sweetheart.  She  sounded so innocent and nice and free spirited.  She had such a sweet voice.  But it’s like there’s this hint of super strong sexuality that is lying just underneath the surface, which I find very, very hot.

So she sucked my cock, and she was throating the whole thing.  She loved feeling it at the back of her throat.  That was hot.  Turned me on so bad!

I verbally told her I was going to eat her out.  That we had to trade, she got to go down on me only if I got to go down on her.  She said, “No!”  I said, “Then you have to stop sucking my cock.”  I’m sure I didn’t seem very forceful and demanding at this point in between sighs of pleasure.  But whatever, it was the point or bartering.

Eventually I turned her over and started taking off her clothes.  I ended up pulling her pants and panties off at the same time.  None of this layer shit.  Get that resistance right the fuck out of the way…  She covered her hand over her pussy.  Just sat there and she was not moving her hand.

I rolled onto my back with a big smile…  “Cool.  We can just chill…  There’s your clothes,” I said, pointing at them.  They were right next to her within easy reach.  She did nothing.  I repeated myself, “There’s your clothes…”

“I’m thinking!” she protested.  Then I’m not sure what happened at this point, if she moved her hand or I went back up and started kissing her and moved down.  I should really remember these things but it was irrelevant really.  Once she said, “I’m thinking!” it was over.

It really was over anyway before we even met up.  The texting and phone conversations were really that good.  We fucked for a while.  Then we went to our day2 at whole foods, drank a $8 bottle of wine like we were in a fancy wine bar, and had a GREAT TIME.

THIS IS NOW MY FAVORITE DAY 2 SPOT EVER!  No – nothing compares.  Nothing compares to Whole Foods Kingsbury as a Day 2 spot.  Nothing at all!  There are people, food, you can buy alcohol for cheap and drink it in the store.  You can walk around drinking it in the store.  When we took the $8 bottle of wine to the Wine Bar in the back (where they actually sell their own wine and cheeze plates.) they opened it and gave us wine glasses to drink them in.  They poured the wine in the glasses like we were at a real wine bar. We sat and drank most of our wine and then got up and explored the store.  There were people set up with food displays, wine displays, all sorts of stuff going on and so much to talk about.  I will say that Whole Foods Kingsbury does not require a Venue Change.  Really.  Want a venue change?  Start out sitting at the wine bar in back and then go sit in the front bar for your second drink.  Walk around.  Go out back and show her the river and the seats they have strategically placed by the river.

This is my Favorite Day 2 spot EVER.

Ok, so it was fun.  I think you get that now.

Then with a wine buzz we went back to my house where she announced she was only staying 15 more minutes.   She wanted a quick one before she left.  It probably ended up more like an hour but no one complained.  I walked her out to her car and she left.  I did a little followup.

For the record this chick is sexy as hell to me.  Entirely fuckable, big, expensive, fake boobs on a sexy “I work in a Fitness center” body..   …  mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…   This is one of my favorite seductions so far.  But aren’t they all…….

Oh and I just realized I didn’t tell you guys where I met her.  She was a street approach I met walking near my home.  A block from me, daytime, I was walking the Late Mr Poop (who I miss like a motherfucker!) and I saw this sexy chick, well built and beautiful with a hint of something that turned me on; blond hair, older woman but hot!   She ended up being 40 which turned me on and still does as I write this.  I feel she’s a keeper, but we’ll see what happens…

The street approach was quality.  Not bullshit fluff, I amped it quickly because I was feeling it.  I wanted to fuck her; I wanted to seduce her; and I knew it.  I just remember immediately telling her to stop flaunting her boobs.  I would glance at her cleavage and then she would “naturally” pull up her top.  I said, “Stop doing that.  You’re only making it worse.  You don’t need to draw any more attention to your boobs than you already are.”

So it was essentially reframing her uncomfortable actions as her trying to seduce me.  It creates the frame and it’s easy to carry.  I got her number and texted her a couple times but wasn’t really getting much response until the Lesbian Seduction Texting started…

« Reply #1 on: November 01, 2011, 05:19 PM »


I like the part about the lesbian porn in your mind.  I should probably try that out, because I’m typically more dominant and forceful.  Some chicks love it, but I know I lose a lot of girls by being that way, too.

Ya – I think when I seduce I like to be more coquette or seductive about it.  Lots of playful push pull.  Lots of en francais which means I want it to be a big play scene.  Sex for me is not about a dominant and submissive role.  I don’t want to feel like it’s me dominating her and her relenting, well…  At least not that that’s the ONLY thing going on.The dynamic is, cats playing.  The dynamic is this is fun playtime.  I want her doing fun things and getting into it.  I think sometimes when we dominate the woman she then says, “Ok – now I have to be told what to do.” and unless one is really specific about telling the girl exactly what he likes or getting her to do it then it may not be as fun.

I’m not like that.  I like surprises and I like her to be excited and want to do whatever she wants to do.  Like in one of my Reports where q woman got on my bed, stripped off her clothes and giggled at me waiting expectantly.  That is what gets me turned on.  Girls resisting me all night telling me they aren’t going to fuck me and then after this playful dynamic they say, “Just fuck me already.”

But there was a little “dominant” going on, but it was still playful.  It’s when I was sitting in my chair and pulled her on to me.  Then I picked her up and carried her to my bed.  Then I took off all her clothes.  But it was so playful and fun she was also telling me things she wanted to do or have me do.

“Turn over.” she said.  She went down and obviously wanted to suck my cock.  She was playing with my nipples later, which gets me uncontrollably hot.  She was doing things freely because she wanted to as much as I did, and the vibe I create is “Lets Play.”

The smile on these women’s faces when we do this.  That’s the stuff that gets me horny.  When she is way into it.  When she is as much telling me what she wants to do or wants me to do to her as I am telling her.

The power dynamic disappears.  We are two people playing and exploring each other sexually.  Women telling me they feel comfortable around me; that’s what get’s me hot.

Related articles

Sidecar:
Lesbian Seductive Texting:

by Ronnie Libra » August 14th, 2009, 2:57 am

(Obviously I posted this a long while ago in Detroit when my game was peaking last.  Also, this is going to be counterintuative to every text method you learned.  It does work.  Some girls will get into you, some girls will get creeped out but you will almost always get a response.  I like to use this on numbers that are staling.  Try it or don’t but if you do it yourself, and you use your OWN words the girl may end up digging on you.)

I have been trying to discover a good text game for a long time now.  It’s like pulling fucking teeth it seems like.  I have NOTHING amazing but have through LOTS of trial and error discovered some things that work but so far it’s been nothing to write home about.

There’s all these rules and regulations about, “keep it short and simple,” and, “match her response,” and this, that and the other thing but I just haven’t found a method that works.  Send a text that doesn’t require a response that makes her want to respond.  Try to build off it with all this Cheesy outrageous texting.  But there has to be a better way.

How about this…  If you are reading this let’s dissect this together.  Let’s pull out the good, great, bad and ugly.  Let’s see if there’s anything we can learn.  Let’s brainstorm it.  I mean if you read it, share what you think…  Let’s get the gold out of these texts.  Maybe we’ll discover something…

First of all the mindset is, “I don’t care.  If she wants to be seduced we’re going to fuck and if not oh well.”  That does NOT require you to rely on whether or not you get feedback or response from the woman.  It does NOT imply that your texts must be short yet powerful.  It does not imply that you text with ANY care about what the girl will think about your texts, the only goal is getting from point A to point F… That’s it.

SO let’s start with what she gave me.  This first part is her setting up the day2.  Some of the texts were already gone from her phone but by reading this I think HBSmokey asked the Married Woman to do something with her.  This is where we’ll start.  YES this is ALL TEXT.  Yes it comes in as 2,3,4 and 5 pages to the receiver:

Married Woman:  Ahh, would be nice but I gotta coach, volleyball just startin up.  I am going to PHX in november.

HBSmokey:  Who’s in Phnx?!  Family, life long friend Or a special “on the side” someone wink wink.  Ehh I myself am going out thr ‘cuz I lovit out thr … the weather & the beaners (mexican chicas) emmmmmmm… tht and an ex girlfriend.

MW:  No, my basketball team is going for 5 days, we play 2 games there.  Sounds like u will have more fun than me…lol

HBSmokey:  I think tht we’re going to be in each others “society” … Of course, as I am charming, attractive (sexified), funny (both ways: ha ha and acme style), clever and addicting and I thnk tht u are intelligent, selfassured & self aware, warm, inviting, respectful, among other things…  But the most important thng is…  You are curious about me & intrigued by me… A little dangerous.  Let’s see whr ths goes…  No worries as I can promise you tht I’ll push Or pursue the line of uncomfortable but!  I will verbally acknowledge your complete value as it pertains to me.  Let’s “socially mingle shall we.”

MW:  Ok we shall…

MW:  Damn girl, u r a fast texter!

HBSmokey: Ehh I  have a blkberry … I’m actually sending ONE txt buh’hut u may receive as multiple… lol! It’ll come across as multiple for sure.  😉  Ehh wuld u be up for breakfast/brunch 2mro?! My treat.  Kah’mon…  Maybe lunch thn.  FYI:  I love sushi… How’bout u?! (Seriously!  Love it! I could eat it everyday).

MW:  Not a big fan of sushi cuz i don’t really like fish, possibly dinner tomorrow just depends how my day goes at work.  I am meeting friends around 9:30 so maybe before that?

HBSmokey:  B4 tht I will pounce on tht extended opportunity to be in your company and have u be all kinds of beautiful!

HBSmokey:  What’s yer flavor/taste? as in food.

MW:  Do you like Thai?

HbSmokey:  I will eat Thai…  😉 Whr wuld u like to go?!

MW:  But do you like it?  We can go somewhere else… Otherwise i think there is a place right on main street

HBSmokey:  I don’t mind it, not my favorite…  But my direct intent is to spend time in your company… Sooo, food is your choice as I can find something to eat any whr tht we go.  U pick.

MW:  Ok how bout Sangria, more generic.

MW:  Let’s shoot for 7, i will text u tomorrow if i need to change time

HBSmokey:  Let me kno if’n it changes on yer end kitten.

MW:  Ok cool

HBSmokey:  Don’t thnk for a second tht I’m not sporting a very smug smile on my face right now…  kuz I am.  Yer fault, yeah yeah kitten… yer fault! Ehh I find myself charming as heck!  Tootles lovey.

MW:  U r charming i love the way u express yourself… “tootles”

HBSmokey:  I hope tht u enjoy the heck outta me Kuzz’ah imma gonna enjoy u until we must part… mmmmm you my “elective affinity” (aka the one whose company is extremely desired)… Alrighty, well my friend is almost to me and we are going to reak some girl havoc.  Mmmmm miss (NAME) (she’s from NY and she thnks tht I’m fabu)… is my company for the evening.  Anywhooo, thnk about me kuz I can feel it whnu do!  Tru story awww yeah.  😉

MW  Ok have a fab time then!

———————————————————————————————————————————————-

That’s the end of the first day’s texts.  Day2 was today’s set.  Even Lesbians get flakes but DAMN I never thought of reframing a girl flaking as SEXUAL…  That’s just Brilliant!  I told her so…

I was like, “She flaked and you’re still sending her all these texts.”

HBSmokey said EVERY Straight chick Flakes at first.  She expects it.  Then she said she texts them until they start flooding her back with texts and then she pulls back.  She doesn’t care about whether the chick responds or not.  She says what she wants to say and that’s it..

———————————————————————————————————————————————-

MW:  Have to reschedule=( sorry.  I forgot I had scheduled double practices today for my volleyball team.  I have to be at school from 6-8.  I feel really bad!

HBSmokey:  Phsssstttt! Fah’get’tah’bout’it!!! Nevr any worries kitten as I am not high maint (yeh feel me  😉 Yeah yeah & sure sure I would love to have had the pleasure of you(your company)ths evening as I wuld like the “getting to know you part” to be well on it’s way to the delightful and all capturing place of the knowing you.    Besides, on some level I kind’a like “the waiting” … Ehh here’s a ‘lil “TMI” (To Much Info)  Maybe TMI…  I like Tantric sex and part of being into ths type of thing is the desire for delayed pleasure (yesss, thr is more to it thn tht buh’hut!)…  and not being able to experience your company ths eve is almost pleasurable to me kuz i have to wait for u (and your schedule).  You see.   😉

HBSmokey:  I’ll tellz’yeh a secret kitten…  Picture these words on ths here phone of yours coming out of my mouth…  Do you have my mouth in your mind?!…  Picture these words rolling off my tongue and all ovr my lips and to your ears…  I am a great temptress and I am very good at seduction.  I would love to seduce you, but you can not seduce the willing, so I will take you on as a desire, a pleasure and a joyful beauty.  I will call you friend and I will keep you in whtever place tht you would like to exist.  I will surrender to your Comfort Zone and we’ll find a place just for us to exist with in each other.  Here I am, as any way tht you would like for me to be.  😉

MW:  Sorry was in practice…  Sounds good, another time for sure.

HBSmokey:  I’m out to eat with Ronni.  Yeah, and he was asking me about you.  I told him that u were beautiful… and he said and I quote; “Well duh.” and I responded with, “I wonder how it feels to kiss to kiss your skin…  The part on the back of your nec’!  Aw the image made us both smile Big!.

That’s all I got.

Comments
Questions
Observations
Critiques
Whatever Else…

Sidecar 2:

Risk Creepy ~by 60yearsofchallenge

Ew, he wrote me a note, that is so creepy. Aw, he wrote me a note, that is so sweet!

Practice Creepy

Guys don’t get enough practice being seductive.

They have tons of practice being social and opening “sets” but not much practice being seductive.

If you want to be seductive you need to risk creepy. In fact, there is no way to avoid creepy. So you might as well admit it right now. You are creepy. But don’t worry, the so called “creepy” guys also gets laid the most.

Don’t Fear Creepy

Using seductive eye contact, looking at her lips while thinking about kissing her, and talking really slow can put women into a sexual trance.

But women will try to scare guys off their seductive game with the threat of the “creepy” label or the “ew you’re creepy” look. And guys will never be at their seductive best if they are still scared of creepy.

Ew or Aw

The threat of creepy is a bunch of crap.

Creepy is just a TEST women use to scare clueless guys off.

If she likes you, you are sexy. If she doesn’t like you or she feels you are not in her league, then you are creepy. This can change day to day or even moment to moment. You can use the exact same eye contact and touch on two separate girls and one will call you creepy, the other will think you are sexy.

Which is the truth?

Neither.

Realize if a woman gives you that “you’re weird” look when you shut up and hold eye contact, it really just means she is trying to break the tension because she is getting turned on.

The implication that you are creepy can also be due to her not wanting to seem like a slut. She is turned on, but she’s pretending she isn’t. She may even tell her friends later that you were hitting on her and it was creepy, but that’s only to protect her social image.

Creepy Blowout

Of course there will be times when you try to be seductive and get blownout. For example, you hold seductive eye contact but she gives you a weird look implying you are creepy. Then she gets up and moves her seat further away from you. Ouch!

But there is really nothing to fear. It’s no different than a verbal blowout. I would much rather have a creepy rejection than a verbal one.

I really enjoy creepy. In fact, I love creepy. I just love putting the pressure on her. Watching women fidget and get nervous. Awesome! I can’t wait to creep some women out tonight.

I know creepy is the label you fear.

It is the reason you hold back and don’t escalate the vibe. The reason you stay in social mode. You would rather get blown out being cocky and disinterested than with seductive eye contact. This way you can keep your cool guy rep.

Your biggest weapons for seducing her are eye-contact, moving closer and touch. And they all come with the risk of creepy.

Be seductive. Risk creepy.

The Real Meanings of Words

Guys need to get over their fear that starting a conversation with a stranger is “weird”, being seductive and escalating is “creepy” and pushing things sexually is “perverted”.

– Risk Weird

If you are being social and start conversations some women will try and test you by saying or implying that you are weird for doing so. Or they will give you that “this is weird” look. Not every guy has the confidence to approach a woman, but it’s definitely not weird.

– Risk Creepy

When you are being seductive women will try to scare you off with the fear of creepy.

– Risk Perverted

When you are being sexually aggressive women will try to test you by calling or implying that you are a pervert. As if this is a bad thing. Yet many guys are scared of the pervert label as it conjures up images of an old guy jerking off in a porno booth. You want to be a pervert.

60yearsofchallenge