Sleep F#@K!%G Apnea

Tsod:

This is not another bitch fest.  This is an update into my sleep stuff I touched upon.  So I went in for this sleep test a few weeks back.   Basically I had to spend the night in this uncomfortable hospital bed with wires hooked up all over my face and body.   I looked like a creature off of Hellraiser or something.  All I know is as creepy as it looked, it was just as difficult to sleep.  I stayed one night in the hospital and was a waste of space for the next day, but the thing is, the things I learned about in my article (well I borrowed the article, but…  Whatever!) “How to Receive a Free Sleep Disorders Test” paid off.

So I got a phone call a couple days ago and was informed, “You have Moderate Sleep Apnea”.  Moderate doesn’t sound all that bad, does it?  Well, the fact of the matter is, I NEVER can get out of bed early and if I don’t get at the very least 8 hours of more of sleep I am pretty much a zombie all day long.  Yesterday I woke up and in a rather short period of time, realized I was tired and had a headache.  Instead of accomplishing anything I pretty much stayed in bed most of the day, and here’s why:

For me, moderate sleep apnea means that I apparently stop breathing or have extremely shallow breathing on average of 28 times every Hour.  Ya, every fucking hour.  I figured something like 28 times in an entire evening would be bad enough but, nope, apparently this is happening on average 224 times a night.  I am losing a lot of good sleep.  Now what does that mean?  I mean, it really can fuck up my life.  There are countless days where I have done almost nothing, and I even believe that this very well could have been the root cause of so many of me traumatic problems I had in my younger years.

My perception of looking at things like a surgeon, including my own feelings, physically and emotionally, was the reason I figured out that just 30 minutes less than the average recommended amount of sleep could ruin my day.   It also makes it pretty much impossible to get up early unless I was going to go to bed around 9pm every evening because when I say 8 hours I have to account for times I am awake.  For instance, yesterday I crashed out pretty early since I was a zombie and was frightfully in pain.  Then I woke up around midnight and stayed up, energized but still with a headache, until around 4:30.   The funny thing about this is that I almost took another leasing  job the day before.  I was right there, in the guys office, signing the forms and stuff to get started.

It was only a day later I had a really shitty night’s sleep and last night a fitful sleep, but thank God I got plenty of it and today I am not so much of a Zombie again (I just realized the joke of Zombie playing Rebuild 2 which is a game about trying to survive the Zombie Apocalypse).  So I am wondering in my witchdoctorish way if I was or am supposed to take that as a sign and not do the leasing thing, still.  In other news, I have a second interview tomorrow for this new Bar opening in Chicago.  I think I wrote about it, maybe not…  Oh I guess I didn’t since I just checked.  I think I’ll just chill and see what happens tomorrow before writing a report.

So if I should follow through with this sleep test, I will have to spend a week in Hospital come February.  What I’m hoping is that successful Insanity Workouts will actually kick my ass into shape and that my sleep apnea will kinda go away.  There is always that possibility that being in more shape and losing some fat will help treat it.  Of course there are no promises, but that’s ok.  It’s still serves as motivation to keep sticking to this crazy man’s workout.  You should have seen the drops of sweat all over my tile floor today. Funny enough, I took a peek at the workouts in month 2 and the insanity get’s just more ridiculous.

Just Fucking Crazy, but man, those women in the video are sexy as hell, for 2 reasons:  1. They are ripped as hell.  2.  They are kicking my ass at the workout, and I can explain why I find that sexy as hell in another post.  For now though…

I have gone into this cocooning of sorts.  I am not really going out to meet women, I am not really dressing all snazzy.  I am simply being for now.  I want to continue this workout and give it a good 2 months and really see what changes take place in my body.  Like I said, I checked into my closet and imagined how cool it would be to fit into some of the clothes I have in there.  For now I am wearing a hoodie top and jeans and my chill shoes.  I want to eventually come out of this cocoon a badass, gladiator mo-fo but like I said in This is Insanity, no pressure not expectation; just do!

and yes I will post before and after pics once I’m done with the first round.

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17 Reasons To Ignore Everybody and Follow Your Dreams

Former basketball player Michael Jordan

Image via Wikipedia

“What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I just had my first piece of press written about the Roller Coaster Tour thanks to the Muskegon Chronicle! Muskegon is where I’m beginning the tour so I naturally contacted them first.

I got some interesting comments in regards to that article. On the whole the e-mails I received from new readers was positive. But one person said, “This is an incredible waste of resources. You should be doing X instead of this.”

Instead of responding and kicking him off his high horse I trashed the message. Those of us who are doing what we want with our lives will always run into naysayers, doubters, and people who think they know better. It’s the crabs in a bucket phenomenon.

Yesterday I read an article on All of Us Revolution (Kristin and Shannon are launching an organic, fair trade, sustainable clothing line!) where they were talking about the “noes” they receive. When they get a “no” they turn to each other and say “yes.” That’s a great attitude. When you’re going after something big lots of people will tell you “no.” Sometimes you’re the only one telling yourself “yes” and that’s OK. Know that you’re in good company.

Yesterday I also talked to my friend Kenny about someone telling him “no, that’s not gonna happen” in regards to him playing Michael Jordan 1 on 1. Later he got a phone call that was a massive “YES!” in the right direction. Maybe the biggest “yes” he has received since beginning his journey.

Nobody is immune to “no.” Preparing for the Roller Coaster Tour has been, in general, a fight against “no,” but I’ll save that for another day.

With that all said, here are 17 reasons you should follow your dreams:

  1. If you don’t follow your dreams you crush your dreams. Eventually you’ll stop dreaming altogether.
  2. There are very few things worse than regret. What will you regret tomorrow that you didn’t do today?
  3. Dreamers who took action have created everything around you.
  4. Following your dreams doesn’t always turn out as planned, but that makes them even more memorable.
  5. Personal growth happens when you stretch yourself. If you don’t follow your dreams you’re not stretching.
  6. You want to be remembered. Everybody does. We remember those who follow their dreams.
  7. Doing what you want attracts haters. This gives you a change to ignore them. They hate that more than anything. Keep doing what you do. (In case that wasn’t clear: Don’t ever engage haters. It’s not worth your time. Let them be losers.)
  8. Your dreams and your actions define you. If you do what others tell you to do then you’re letting them define you.
  9. Following your dreams gives you the opportunity to Ignore Everybody.
  10. When people who look up to you see you following your dreams it will inspire some of them to follow their dreams.
  11. When people who don’t even know you see you following your dreams it will inspire some of them to follow their dreams as well. (<– This is one of the reasons I write publicly on this website.)
  12. Following your dreams makes you interesting.
  13. You learn a lot from failure. Since you will fail on your path you’ll learn a lot too.
  14. Someone who’s motivated to accomplish something great is instantly sexier.
  15. There are no rules in life so why limit yourself to what everybody else is doing?
  16. You might live forever, but you might also die tomorrow. Take a chance.
  17. It’s better than watching TV.

I’m gonna continue following my crazy dreams. How about you?

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Always give credit where credit is due.  I stole this article from it’s author.  Find out how you can steal his stuff too by checking out his blog on Freedom, Health, Travel, and Life:

Ridiculously Extraordinary by Karol Gadja

Enjoi

What to Write About?

Sculpture of Bruce Lee at the Avenue of Stars,...

Image via Wikipedia

It’s interesting how a person can trick themselves into not thinking they have anything to talk about or that they can’t think of anything to write about.  I just had a spotty conversation with a girl who was next to me in the coffeeshop, and she was giving me a shot.  She wanted to see what I was all about but my conversation was choppy.  I kept talking about crap topics.  And crap topics can be ok, if there is a flow.

But the point is, all around me there is stuff.  I am in Chicago; one of the Major Cities on this earth.  I am in Kickstand Coffeeshop.  They call it Kickstand Espresso Bar which, when I actually look, they have a bar type setup where they make the espresso. Not the regular espresso machine behind the counter or off in a corner with a service area like at Starbucks.  Yep, they have a bar and there are actually 3 people sitting up at the bar like it’s a real bar.  There are 2 old bicycles on the wall.  There is art on the walls; Battleships, Deathstar, Burlesque chick, things everywhere to talk about.  Things everywhere to write about; people, places, things.  Even now, as I write this I am more focused on what I am writing, whether it is any good or not instead of flowing like I usually do.

So welcome, to my expirament!  My purpose to to push past the cobwebs and break through to reality.  I think we all get like this sometimes.  Our minds are clouded with stuff that has nothing to do with what’s really going on in our reality and we miss all the cool shit happening right in front of our faces.  I’m sure I’m not the first person to point this out to you either.  We get so caught up in our work, or that thing that happened at work, or am I doing the right thing or what will something think if I do “THIS”, is this the right time, what will make the biggest impact, I don’t want to sound uncool.

My favorite times are when I flow, like Bruce Lee (like water), I flow.  I don’t think about what I’m doing and saying – I just do and say, and THOSE times are always the BEST times of my life.  I think my personal preference would to be like that all the time.  I will throw out some excuses and then examine each one.  These are my excuses right now as to why my conversation was shit with that girl and why I am not flowing today (even though – as I push forward – my writing is starting to f-l-oooo….wwwwwwwwwwwwwww.  Got to – push past!).

  • I had a shitty sleep day yesterday so I am recovering today.
  • I have a headache.
  • I’m not in the mood to talk to someone really.
  • I don’t know what to say.
  • How can I get her into bed?  I need to do the right thing…  (yes – most of you are new to my life since I have made it my mission to freestyle this blog but as we go along you will understand, I promise.  And my guess is – it will be a fun ride.  Alright – no more cheezy self-plugs 😉
So here we go.
  • I had a shitty sleep day yesterday so I am recovering today.

Well that’s EXACTLY why you should be enjoying the fuck out of today – SQUEEZE the juice out of life.  You Love talking to people and most of the time people like talking to you.  What kind of kickassness can you bring into someone else’s day?  How many memories do you have of lighting people up like a lightbulb?
  • I have a headache.

Cool so that means you can’t talk?  Don’t want to talk?  Well, I do want to talk to people.  It’s what I do best.  I am able.  So earlier today I say the guy in my ally.  I think of him as the Bazaar merchant.  He’s a homeless guy with only 1 hand.  He has a shopping cart, but it is not filled with his belongings.  No man, he’s always got stuff to sell.  Where does he get it?  From the Trash.  It’s stuff people throw out, and I know this because I saw him going through the trash.  Now some people will knock that shit.  They will say, “fucking bum going through the trash!”  But man, look.  Some people do marketing online.  Some people do real estate.

You know what I was doing for the past year?  Making money off free shit.  How?  I was a leasing agent for real estate.  Technically I still should be but my brain is shouting to follow my dreams.  And then I come across writings like this guy’s that screw me up even more: http://wayneelise.com/2011/07/fat-captain-america.html

What I mean by “screw up” is that I have been doing some serious thinking.  You may already know if you are reading this or you may not.  So I feel like I have a gift.  I know writing is one of them.  I know exploring is another.  I know Travelling is another.  I know I also have a gift to inspire, move, light up -people.  I think I need to use it more.

What is stopping me?  Sleep problems.  Money.  I need to have a secure job to pay my bills.

But man, really?

Ok – the sleep problems I am looking into.  I have someone who is supposed to follow up with me for a sleep study soon.  I read a pretty cool article here:

Whoa!  Check this out.  So I read this article the other day that inspired me to get a free sleep study.  I tried it.  I emailed all over the place asking for a sleep study and I got someone who is helping me.  All I have is the Google Cache – the WEBSITE has taken it down?  Now when you click on the link it goes to another article on how to get a good nights sleep.  If you are suffering from some sort of sleep problem, an article like that is useless.

So here’s what I’m gonna do, because I feel like it was so much of a good article it should be posted somewhere.  I am going to copy it into my blog and credit the author.  If he wants me to take it down later – cool, I will.  But that shit totally helped me, at least motivated me, to get the ball rolling and seek out a sleep study on my own, even though I could not afford it.  If I find later that they restore the article I will maybe remove mine.  🙂

Done and Done.  Where was I?

So the guy in the ally.  He has more than a headache.  He has no home.  No job.  And whenever I drive by him and ask, “How’s it goin?” he’s says, “I got up today!  I’m here!” and he’s happy about it.  I actually bought a bottle of Shout from him one night.  It coulda been mostly water for all I know but he was out there trying.  I can hear some business marketer saying, “Ya well he isn’t trying to his full potential because if he was he could do more with himself than sell trash out of a shopping cart.”  But I disagree.  The thing is we are all given a gift, BUT it is SUPER hard to find.

I have made a decision to follow my gift, my path, and I have no idea how I’m going to make it pay for my rent, buy my food, but then again – THAT’S the shit that stops me from following my path, and that’s the scary part.  It’s like, life wants to offer us this cool path.  It’s like the ‘Golden Path to Happiness’ (or the rainbow path or whatever color you want) but the problem is, it looks like shit.  It is scary to follow and most people never take that path.  I promise you.  Ask someone working in that cubicle what they wanted to do with their life.  Did they want to work in a cubicle?  DO they want to even now?  No, man!  They have dreams!  They have that happy place in their mind that they are trying to figure out how to get to.

I’m wondering – is that path blocked by illusions?  Is it blocked by smoke and mirrors.  It’s kinda like in those movies where…  Well take a look:

Is that metaphor?  Could that be a metaphor for all of our lives?  It’s fucking like, “Shit!  I’m gonna fall, if I go that way, into that deep dark pit!  Then I’ll be dead!  That sucks!  But look – over there on the other side is the thing that I REALLY want.  There are my dreams over there!  Maybe I’ll go look for a safer way around…”

But what if there isn’t one. (for the record, I was supposed to be in the scholastic olympics when I was in school for English Grammar.  I completely  understand the rules I break:  Run-on sentences, starting sentences with But or And, maybe even spelling words in ways I feel they make more sense, but that is the BEAUTY of art and to me writing is my art – so I will create!  Not that you were nitpicking but I really wanted to get that out since everytime I make one of those grammatical errors I make a mental note.  😉  What if there is no other path.  What if the key to taking your path is just going through the illusion and just going!  You might fall.  You may die.

Buh’hut – would you rather die after having tried and failed, OR would you rather play it safe, never find out and die old regretting that you never took a chance?

So here I am at that part in my life.  I could be a leasing agent.  I could sell apartments and then eventually get into apartment sales.  I live in Chicago and I am pretty much broke.  I moved here – why?  Because I liked cities. I do like it here, but I can’t say that I might not like somewhere else better.

Lyoto Machida
Following    lyotomachidafw Lyoto Machida
I’m just a regular guy that had a dream and ran for it.

And if I’m supposed to be following this dream and that dream takes me somewhere else, I mean, that sounds fucking exciting!  I have left and went to a few different places now with almost no money but I keep ending up not where I want to be.  I mean, I like it, I have fun.  I have met some amazing people and had some awesome experiences (thank you ladies – you know who you are!  ;p ) but I always manage to end up back here.  I always start writing and I want to keep writing.  I want to share.  I want to just write it down.

Do I wanna use my writing creatively?  Do I wanna use it to make screenplays?  I have thought about it.  But really I just like to write, adventure, experience, write.  I think if I were to do a screenplay I would want to do my first one along a successful screen play writer.  That is a TASK and not necessarily what I mean by, “I want to write.”  I just enjoy doing what I’m doing right now.  For all I know half the people reading this are like, “Fuck this shit!  What the hell is this guy rambling about?  What’s the point?”  Maybe not.  Maybe someone, somewhere can find something in all this blah blah that means something to them.

Maybe someone else will read this and be inspired to throw all the bullshit aside and follow their dreams too.  And if that happens?  My work here is DONE!  1 Person pulled from a life of meaningless blah and into a place where things start clicking …  I don’t even need to know about it.  You don’t have to write me a thankyou letter.  If you did, kick ass!  I will take it.  But a simple thanks for the audio tape I will review when I die will suffice.

So here I go.  My life experiment.  To see where following my deepest dreams take me.  I like writing and I think I am good at it.  Here we go!

(yes yes yes – I understand I didn’t address the other points.  Maybe later… 😉

Now go back up and click the word “shitty”.

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