Overcompensating – The DREAD of the Intermediate Seducer

I came across a video earlier today when bouncing around on my twitter account.  I watched the video and the old familiar dread started to hit me.  Guys, EVEN guys coaching this stuff, still have one HUGE sticking point. That is overcompensation.  Whether it be “Overcompensating Alpha” or “Overcompensating Abundance Mindset” or whatever.  Overcompensating is a HUGE thing that fucks up so many people in the Seduction Community.  In pretty much every case it is never the real deal.  It is covering up for the thing they lack. 

In the case of a guy who is overcompensating alpha behaviors, it’s usually to try and make up for his fear that he is not alpha enough, and that is usually after he studies something, somewhere about how the alpha male is the one getting all the tail. (Hey I like that.  It rhymes. – The alpha male gets all the tail.)  So now this guy who a week ago who was timid and shy is now trying to be alpha but is clumsy with it so he either just comes across as annoying or he goes out of his way every chance he gets to prove his “alpha” behavior traits.  So now when a girl he texts to go out, doesn’t show up to the date, he says, “FUCK THAT BITCH!  I’ll show her not to waste my time!  I am an ALPHA MALE!  I’ll make sure she knows it and I won’t give her an opportunity to go out with me EVER AGAIN!”  Meanwhile the poor guy just completely missed the point of being alpha.  Because where he thinks in his mind he is being this big alpha male, he is ACTUALLY making a bigger deal out of her not showing up than it really was.  Where if he was calm, cool, and nonreactive he could have texted her or called her later and had the possibility of even using her flake as a way to escalate the interaction toward sex.

That’s just one example.  The list, unfortunately goes on and on.  “Not buying girls drinks,” becomes, “Don’t take girls on dates,” becomes as one guy put it recently on a private forum I belong to (and unfortunately in that case also he was coaching other guys), “Relationships are boring,” then later, “I don’t do that whole date thing.”  In other words, you can see where I’m going with this.  When guys let TRAINING rules become guidelines to define their lives, and they overcompensate for their lack of something in their personality, they create a mess.  If a guy wont take his own girlfriend on a date because he let a rule about – not buying bottle-rats in a nightclub a drink or taking a girl out to a $150 dinner so she can politely kiss him on the cheek and then go home and call “Jobless-Backwards-Hat-Guy” to come over and rail her – take over his life, but then complains that girlfriends are boring…  I mean, come on man.  It’s your job as a man to LEAD.  If shit is boring in your relationship, then take her out.  If a fear of getting taken advantage of has infested your mind to the point that you overcompensate “Alpha” by avoiding going and having adventure-time with your girl – well, not very alpha is it?  But the list of these things in the community goes ON and ON…

This kind of thing is, in reality, just about the same thing as a guy buying an expensive sports car because he thinks it will get him more women in his life.

Which brings me to the next point.  Overcompensating Abundance due to Lack of Abundance.  Let’s watch this video by a guy who is coaching for Daygame.com – then I will follow up with the reply I left on their blog about the video (which is what prompted me to write this big Diatribe in the first place… 😉 )

(Interesting how now the video is marked “Private” – Just noticed as of 10/25/2014.  Basically he was talking about how there IS no Soulmate or there IS no One Special Girl in the world.  Tom El Toro or whatever his name is from Daygame.com seemed really bitter and jaded in this video and reminded me of a guy who just found out about the community and still hadn’t dealt with the anger issues.  That’s kind of the point of this article.)

My reply:

Yes and no. I think you have good intentions by teaching this, but it’s also part of the dogma that screws up so many guys in the community.

Check it out, back in the day Mystery said it best. We are learning a skillset so that when we do come across that amazing girl we are ready to act and know what to do (not an exact quote but I’m too lazy too look it up).

Some guys get into this community to find a girl, get married, and live happily ever after. The funny thing is, I know guys who did just that. They went out a few times and ended up meeting a kickass girl they liked and then got married. So what? I don’t see anything wrong with that idea.

Personally, I have slept with so many girls at this point I can’t count them, but I STILL believe the one is out there. I do think there is a perfect chick out there for me. But the DIFFERENCE between the way I go about it and the way most guys will go about it is what you talk about, “oneitis”.

However, what so many what I call “New School” guys (like yourselves) tend to do is overcompensate a lot of rules that were made as stepping stones towards seduction NOT die-hard rules.

For instance, guys like to take things like, “Don’t buy girls drinks,” to ridiculous proportions. SO you got guys doing boneheaded shit like inviting a girl to go out for drinks and then when the tab come looking at the girl like, “are you going to pay your half?”

That doesn’t come across as Alpha or Socially Savvy – it actually has the opposite effect. The guy comes across as Socially Awkward and a Cheap Ass – kinda like the friend I had in highschool who would ask for gas money after asking me to come to the mall with him.

Same thing in this case. ONEITIS – It is not meant to teach guys to have this sad, hopeless, bleak outlook that there is not a kickass perfect girl for them out there. It is meant to instruct guys to go out, keep playing, and approach LEARNING from an ABUNDANCE mindset. So instead of the new guy going after only one woman, he can go after several to LEARN HIS SKILLSET.

But again, unfortunately a lot of the new-blood misconstrued the concept and now it has become more than a stepping stone to training, it has become an IDEAL – It has become DOGMA! Actually, what is has done is also become a PROTECTION, a SHIELD against getting hurt. So in essence, where you say it is coming at things from an ABUNDANCE mindset – the reality is that it is actually viewing things from a SCARCITY Mentality.

Reason being, you said it yourself. There are literally billions of people out there. So you’re saying that out of all those billions of people out there, you can’t find a chick who is perfect for you and vice versa? I know you kinda stated it as, “There are several the ‘the ones’”, and that’s about the closest you got to it, but that most important point is buried by the bleakness of the rest of your presentation.

So let’s go back. Why are you preaching scarcity? Because a man of TRUE abundance would have absolutely no DOUBT that there is a perfect girl for him. That’s abundance thinking. Ya, there are a LOT of kickass girls, but for sure there is one amazing chick out there for me. But I’m not going to stop, drop and roll and just look for her. No man, life is a journey and I will enjoy all these chicks along the way, maybe even thinking that the current or next girl could be her, I might even allow myself to “fall in love” with the girl, if it’s even for 1 night. So when I say scarcity, the REASON guys say there is no “One” is to PROTECT THEMSELVES from FAILURE. That’s not abundance thinking at all. You’re afraid of putting yourself out there and getting rejected.

It is simply an intermediate form of “fear of rejection”.

But it’s also an indicator of where you’re at with your game. I just hope that, now, because you are coaching that you can still have an open mind and learn this, instead of being stuck in rigid, community dogma type thinking.

So have a true abundance mindset. I’m a badass motherfucker! Of COURSE there is one kickass Rare, superfly chick out there who is a perfect match for me. There could only be one BECAUSE I’m so rare, amazing and unique! I may find her one day or I may not, but I will look for her, and have a hell of a lot of fun in the process.

In the long run, by having that positive mindset, a guy can actually go – “hmmm. Holy shit! This girl I’ve been with for the past year… She’s pretty awesome.”

The DANGER of what you are talking about is teaching guys who come into this just to find a girlfriend that there is something wrong with that. Guys come into the community thinking they want a girlfriend and come across overcompensating dogma, and believe it. Now the guy who just wanted a girlfriend thinks he needs to fuck multiple women. Then he comes across more bad information and thinks the girls he fucks are not hot enough. He can’t just like the girl he met at the party last month; he has to bang strippers, the hot club bartender and the supermodel.

You see what I’m saying? It goes ON AND ON AND ON. Where does it stop? With a guy getting frustrated because the goals he acquired since he joined the community are not even his own goals anymore, but the goals of desperate guys who were trying to figure out ways to overcompensate for their lack of abundance?

No man, don’t crush the dream. Just teach men a different approach to getting there… ;)

Just to summarize. These rules are made to learn not to adhere to as life-defining dogma.

1. My example of “Not buying girls drinks.” – It is meant to teach guys to be wary of the outdated concept of buying a girl a drink to gain her attention. It is so new guys don’t go to a club and some bottle-rat asks him to buy her a drink, and he thinks it’s going to help him get laid. In other words, it is so he does not get taken advantage of.

2 . Oneitis – It is meant as a training tool to keep guys focused on pursuing multiple women at the same time so they can learn a skillset. It is meant as a way to have them understand, at first, that there is “no special girl” so they don’t get stuck chasing after one girl. In my opinion, playing with many is the key to finding the one. By not assuming each of them is AUTOMATICALLY special we can be free to find out for real which one really PROVES to be special.

That’s the point so many people miss. True abundance vs overcompensating for scarcity with false abundance.

It is NOT meant to deter them from relationships. What I like to tell guys is, they can do what they ultimately want. Relationships are cool. But if you want to get better at seduction it takes practice and setting down with one chick can stall out progress. But it is all about TRAINING. Not about IDEALS to adhere and cling to to define one’s life.

You dig?

Questions, Comments, Love, Hate?  Share it here in the comments and SUBSCRIBE!!  😉

Cheers!

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Constant Kino and A Short Cut Through Kino Escalation

So much to add to my blog and so little time.  I gotta give people some breath, however I feel that my blog now is evolving based on my students’ needs and that’s cool by me.  But you don’t give a shit about all that 😉  On to the good stuff.

Another Article by Sonics – This time:

Subject: Constant Kino
Date: January 25th, 2008 02:36:44 PM (EST)

Author: sonics

Themesong:

(I got a question about Constant Kino on another forum, I started answering it and this is what came out… thought I’d post it for your guy’s eyes too.)

First off, Constant Kino isn’t really anything new… I just named it because it’s something I’ve noticed myself doing and I thought with a name it’d be easier for people to understand and able to help them more. I’m sure many of you readers have been doing this naturally forever; but this is for the guys who that haven’t been.

This isn’t like Mehow’s Pure Kino, which is like doing the trust test or a palm reading (I don’t read palms; but palm reading is an example of a Pure Kino Routine), Constant Kino is your legs touching each other’s while doing the palm read and remains constant after the palm read is over.

The actual constant thing doesn’t start until you actually know the girl a little… really, a half hour after knowing someone doesn’t mean you KNOW them know them; but that’s about how long it takes to get to this point, in most cases… you meet a girl get to know her then all of a sudden you guys are always touching…

It is by all means perfect for alone time, alone meaning just you and her. Day 2 stuff, special case bar girls : ), or maybe there just isn’t any room for anything but for Constant Kino to take place, like you met a girl while you were seated at a party on a packed couch.

It’s all in the name; you are constantly touching her, think of it as always having some kind of kino going on. Not you just keep touching her here and there throughout the interaction. You are always, constantly, touching her and she is always touching you as well by default, many times it will be the girl initiating it.

Think of subtle long lasting kino as the bottom line of this.

Say you’re watching a movie in the theatres (which still works as a completely acceptable day 2) and you guys are sharing an armrest with your elbows and forearms against one an others, or maybe your knees are touching.

That’s weak and basic but still what I mean by Constant Kino. I just wrote that example as a final way for you to have an idea of what it is you’re reading about.

I think of PDA as a public display. Constant Kino, while having many of the same “moves,” isn’t really for others to see. While PDA is Constant Kino, Constant Kino is also a term that explains what the lasting kino is when no one else is there to see. PDA should never stop, the people just need to leave : )

Like when you’re at one of your houses on the couch and she throws her feet on your lap or say you guys are cuddling. Like in my HBBcup LR, where our legs were touching while I was standing at the table, no one else could see, it wasn’t even a big deal, it was just happening, purposely.

Once you have Constant Kino going, and if the situation allows it PDA, sex is inevitable. The comfort and familiarity with touching each other has been going on since you first started hanging out, it’s then only natural to full close. You don’t need it; but when I’m running solid game Constant Kino is always there.

If you think about the word “Constant” you’ll remember to be doing it. Now you can sometimes draw attention to it; but for the most part it’s something neither of you two should be thinking about… which is kind of a contradiction since I told you to remember the term; just don’t make a big deal out of it happening while you’re making it happen.

This will sound a little AFC to the new guys; but think of you and the girl temporarily sharing your world, kino and all; that’s where you want to be. Get her here and it’s crazy what chicks will do.

OBVIOUSLY, you shouldn’t and can’t always be touching the girl. Leave the girl every once and awhile with her friends or your friends, then when you come back go Constant Kino again. Keep it subtle and discrete, not always PDA. The only person that really needs to know about the kino is the girl herself. That goes for all kino really. You don’t have to or even really want to be claiming the girl in front of others, unless you can tell that that’s what she wants. (Anybody with a decent level of female facial calibration will be able to tell if you’re claiming her to show the guy talking to her, (if her eyes stay locked on you while a guy is claiming her, she’s telling you to keep going) this just makes me lose respect for the guys. I used to be that guy)

Constant Kino is a shared thing, if the girl isn’t receptive yet, wash rinse and repeat later. That I suppose is where the escalation in this comes into play. Say you’re on a day 2 at the mall and you go for the hand hold, she’s not feelin’ it, you drop her hand. You do it again, she’s still not really feelin’ it, and you drop it again. A little later, for a third time you’re walking slightly in front of her, you go for it and she holds onto two and a half of your fingers like she’s been your chick for the last year. (Take her someplace secluded and go Constant Kino with your body parts (legs, arms, feet, back of hands, palms, etc.)… and escalate.)

It’s all the places you would normally touch; you’re just doing it constantly letting the kino continue.

Try this once you get the Constant Kino going: after you’ve been touching each other for a few hours break it off for no reason and watch her come back in or ask you “what’s wrong?”

Remember kino is a reward. If she’s bothering you in anyway, no kino!! Be playful with it, while making it something you just do.

Like I wrote at the top of this post, I’m sure a lot of you guys are doing this already, now, if you weren’t already, you can consciously add to your already existing skills in this area. This was more for the people that weren’t doing it already… Keep it constant guys… it’ll help.

Ways I’ve initiated the Constant Kino:

1) tickle attacks to snuggle kino

2) “Let’s see if you fit”

3) random hand placement (if you’re in her car just reach over and put your hand on her leg)

4) Grab her hands and put them on you

5) move her body parts (leg on top of your leg when side by side)

6) all sorts of close close proximity types

7) just the tips of your shoes

8 ) hand on her lower back

9) start it on the dance floor!!

10) Hugs with a spin into proximity shoulders touching

Thanks for reading.

If you have any relevant questions… fire away

-Sonics

Sidecar:

Subject: “Lets see if you fit…” *A shortcut through Kino Escalation*
Date: July 13th, 2007 07:32:34 PM (EDT)

Author: sonics

A Sonics original (to the best of my knowledge at least) … enjoy

*A short cut through Kino escalation*

This will help you get to that point of pushing the interaction towards a make out, or a ONS, or potential girlfriend, or FB, whatever… here it is, fun and easy:

“Let’s see if you fit”

Use this after you both like each other. Could be instant or it could be after awhile, no interaction is the same, it could be after you isolate, a lot of the time, for me, it’s after very little Kino has been exchanged or before any Kino has been established at all, you both wanna touch each other, this just helps that happen…

You’re sitting next to her and you make space for her to scoot in under your arm to do a sit up cuddle and say “let’s see if you fit” then you guys do a sit up cuddle.

Or

Simply stand next to her and say “Let’s see if you fit” with an arm out as if you’re inviting her to come in. Have her step in under your arm with your arm on her lower back…

Or

Hold out your hand and say “let’s see if it fits” and hold her hand, fingers interlocked below the waist in a “we’ve been dating” kind of way.

This has been field tested by me for the last month and a half and the girl will ALWAYS come in to see if she fits! So far for me anyway, and that’s a lot of different girls auditioning for the fit. Remember this is after attraction, the majority of the time it’s after all those IOI’s, after those shared stories, after you’ve felt each other out and feel comfortable with each other, most importantly when it feels right. I’ve yet to F this up; but probably will one day who knows. It’s worked for the guys I’ve told already too, so, if you want, I’m sure it will work for you too.

Make sure to act as if it’s no big deal, and just continue being yourself and doing the same thing you were doing before the Kino.

This is just one way and probably the best LINE so far I’ve found to initiate Constant Kino, which is huge in my game. I know it’s a line; but once you get here a couple times you’ll be able to think of a thousand different ways to get Constant/Comfort Kino.

This is perfect for the time spent together at the bar after a number close, or walking down the street to a new venue, and standard in isolation.

This is not the time to say no you don’t fit and throw her away, unless of course you still feel like playing and aren’t ready to take that step… cough <wuss> cough This is the beginning of your new playfully enjoyable and shared world. Think “couple Kino.”

Happy Flower Picking,

-Sonics

Sidecar II:  

I chose The Stooges because last night I was writing this at a bar in Chicago where I decided to go, and finish up work and at least give myself an opportunity to open sets while I was working.   Sooo.  Once I finished doling out homework, answering emails and posting this, this song came on so I made it the themesong.  PS – I like Iggy Pop and the Stooges anyway.

Did you know he actually helped fund and pay for the air conditioner for a place called Sweat Records in Miami, which is a Record Store that doubles as a coffeeshop?

The Burlesque Dancer and the Dream Cruise

Tsod:

So, We have to take a quick break from Rainbow Dash for a minute because I’m working with a student right now, and I am trying to teach him a few subtleties to his game that I feel this Report has in it. This is a report about open to close. I wont say much about it because, already, it’s pretty long. Keep in mind, I wrote this when I was a bit younger.  I probably have a lot different mindset back then.  Enjoi

by Geese Howard » August 19th, 2007, 8:58 pm

My Field Reports are long so grab yourself some tea, coffee, or a snack if you are actually gonna read this. Cigarettes are cool too and for you Highons its cool if you smoke a little but dont get so high that you cant remember anything.

So its 1:30 and I haven’t heard of one person joining me for the Dreamcruise so I decide to head out anyways and take Mr. Poop for a walk.

I walk for a few minutes and as always Poop is pulling massive attraction. Its kinda hard to have Poop as a wingman. Sometimes people are checking him out, not even paying the least bit of attention to me. Every once in a while, though it pays off. Not today however.

I walk and see 0 sets. Its early. all the hot chicks are still hungover or having their last bit of sex before they go home to get ready to go out.

Eventually I see this chick whos ok. Shes the Medical marijuana chick. I say simply, “Youre from Flint.”

“Yes I am.”

We talk for a minute and she mentions her husband or something but I just keep blabbing about ppl from flint. I had no interest in this chick at all and was doing warm ups. However, I did notice something. I started moving slowly and she was walking with me talking. She asked my name.

I decided to run an expirement. I stopped and she stopped and we talked some more. I didn’t bust her for asking my name, I simply told her. More BS then I started moving slowly to see. Yep, she moved with me some more. Soon she was asking my name again. Then I busted on her about smoking too much dope giving her ‘No Term’ memory.

Soon another person came up who was interested in signing the petition so I moved on. PS I had made it clear from the get go that I had already signed the petition at DEMF to rule out any possibility of the interaction being about her trying to get me to sign.

I walked some more. I see this chick walking by a few minutes later with her dog. Im eating but want to approach so I start doing the stalk. Me and Dillon totally Stalked chicks at DEMF trying to make it seem like we werent at all following them and then opening them pretty successfully once they stopped. I did the same here. Im walking along at a distance kind of happening along the same path she was but soon enough Mr Poop fucks it all up. A lady walks up and says, “OMG you have a Bulldog! I have a boxer! Can I pet him? Will he bite me?”

Yes.

I always say yes if someone asks if my dog bites them in the context of “Can I pet him?”

Or if they ask if they can pet him I say, “No.”

But Im kidding and usually I say that after the look of disappointment crosses their face.

This lady didnt care. She pet him anyways. So I Stopped and chatted and my Target disappeared.

Oh well.

So I walked after a few minutes up to woodward looking for a place to chill, have a drink and tie Poop up to the railing outside so we both could relax.

I see a semi cute 2 set and another semi cute 3 set in a full outside area. I open the closest 2 set.

“Can you guys do me a favor? I need you to drink your drinks down real fast and get outta here so I can have your table.” 🙂

Cute girl one: “Oh you want this table?”

Nothing really interesting went on with these two. I really did just want their table, but the one on the right had big boobs and was drunk already from the night before. I talked and busted on them a little and the whole interaction was fun. Something Funny happened and I totally got the one friend to laugh at the other friend about something but my combination of quick with and absentmindedness sometimes doesnt quite pay off when I want to rememeber something cool I said.

So Im facing away from them a little and I see a chick walk by. 5’8″ or so, nice body, red hair dyed, perky, big looking boobs, pretty face and kind of that punk/bettie page/retro look that does it for me.

Walking…

Here she comes…

I have three seconds to come up with that intriguing, kickass, Im the alpha, engaging opener that will stop her dead in her tracks and make her want to come over and have sex with me…

I look, she’s wearing a blue shirt with a Felix the Cat on it.

Brilliant Opener here it comes… Shes close enough to hear me.

“Hey you have Felix the Cat on your shirt!”
(I specifically remembered this for you opener fixated guys out there.)

HBSproket: Yep. (as she keeps walking barely looking at me)
Me: Because I like Felix the cat and always used to want to watch it when I was a kid. (Fucking Mr Smooth talker right now :oops: )

But the whole time Im picturing Lovedrops Ass on the MM vids saying, “… and the next time he was in set he just stayed where he was and leaned back and kept talking louder… and louder…” So I stood. I didn’t turn with her as she walked by and I kept getting louder and simply turned my head as I talked my Wonderful opener, and guess what? She stopped. She was four feet past me and just like that miss, “I could really give a fuck about what youre saying right now” mysteriously Stopped and turned a little to face me.

I successfully stopped a moving target like they told us was not too likely in the Juggler workshop. Not that I agreed but Ive heard alot of the Guru types say how hard it is to stop a moving target because the only thing on their mind is their destination. Of course RJ says the key is to break their state. Then Lovedrop says, “If I see guys following a moving set, You’re Out! Trust me You’re Out!”

So I asked her if she’s even ever watched Felix the Cat before while simultaneousy turning somewhat to face her.

HBSproket: Yea
Me: Bullshit! Dude I looked all over the TV when I was a kid and I could never find it.

HB: I did watch it. (Smiling a little.)
Me: What channel did you see it on?

And we’re off. So We have a minute conversation about Felix the Cat. IMHO it wasnt anything that was being said that made a fuck of a difference. My next brilliant thread was about something I cant even remember and possibly about DreamCruise stuff and mostly fluff the I asked her where she was headed. OK sure I was being a little smart ass and doing some Cockyfunny but my state was good and so it made for a good state. Keep in mind the warmups. We talked for about 4 minutes.

So she tells me she’s headed to the WAB. I tell her, “Well then I guess you’re fucked.”

HB: Why?
ME: Because I just walked by there a minute ago and they’re having some Private Party. Thats why Im standing here waiting for these two girls to leave so I can snag a table. (mentally I said it on purpose to see if she would bite – she did)
HB: Then you want some company?
Me: No. (smile)
(and I say it really child like when I say a stupid No to a chick, like Not real loud but deep and forceful and bratty.)
Just kidding, you can join me, just dont get any ideas. (you know this last part might or might not be what I said but it was something to that effect Im sure of it.)

So I tell her to grab the table as the chicks miraculously get up at the exact right moment. So she does and I tie up Mr Poop to the rail and we sit.

We drink Bloody Mary’s and I playfully bust on the waitress and Mr Poop is doing his job as a wingman getting everyone to talk to me and making me shine as a social guy. People are taking pictures of him and girls are asking me about him and so on and my target who I sporadically talk to and then ignore at intervals sits and orders food and we sip away at Bloody Marys and have a good time.

Most of the interaction went naturally for a while for me. I riffed. I do that alot. Then I was running out of stuff to say.

Times that she asked me personal stuff I ducked and dodged.

HB: Where did you move from?
Me: I don’t think we’ve reached the point in the relationship yet where we can talk about that kinda stuff yet. We’re still on small talk.

So it was going OK. I wasnt exactly seducing her I dont think. Until.

Me: talking about blah blah then stopping and looking around as if thinking: “Isnt it interesting how everyone is so different yet in so many ways we’re all the same?”

HB: Well I guess so but I don’t think that applys to everyone. Blah Blah Blah.

Me: I know but I’ve moved around alot in my time and I grew up in Europe at a young age. (I went into my Grew up in Europe Memory Routine that is my real experience and really didnt start out as a routine but I realised I always tell the story in a good set. Comfort I suppose.)

Then I totally Tangent out and am off and gone for a minute talking about people. Then I reopen the Pattern Thread and continue.

“I mean… Hmm. Ok! For example. I dunno what it is you do when you decide for yourself that you wanna be with someone… And so on…”

I get to the part about connecting so strongly with and she says, “Yea but That doesn’t really happen very often.”

But up until that point I could SEE her trance. I guess they call it DDB. So I didnt freak I simply turned it back on.

You’re right. I dont think it happens very often to me either, but sometimes you just meet this person that your talking to and something just clicks and you can just feel that connection. Now, with me Its different… Blah Blah Blah you get the point. The Key to NLP IMO is twofold. They say use the patterns as guidelines to make up your own language. I say use the patterns like a written song and then riff off of them like Jimi Hendrix Playing the National Anthem at Woodstock or ‘Gloria’ for that matter.

Back to the pattern and finish.

She starts opening up and talking about stuff like that and somehow something she said reminded me of the Incredible Connection pattern somewhere a little into it so aRiffing I go into the middle of the pattern and I can see her trance back on.
BAM! (Like Emeril.)

I honestly believe the more I use patterns that they are powerful motherfuckers. I even believe I have a natural tendancy to induce trance with them because I actually believe that EVERY time I do one I notice a difference in the chick and how she responds afterwords.

So far its just the connections pattern but HERE is the SMALL detail that forwarded the interaction to the next step.

One word.

“Yet.”

We were talking about paying for drinks in a light hearted way and keep in mind we were bantering back and forth alot too. She actually said that she thought I was good conversation at the beginning because I had thrown my smart ass remarks at her rather quickly.

So she says something about me buying her drink and I say, “I cant pay for your drink. We havent even kissed ‘yet’.” No cheesy pause before yet or anything but she picked it right up.

She laughed and said, “You said yet.”

Me: Yea but I cant promise you anything. 🙂  All you get is interesting conversation and good company. Besides, are you adventurous?

Her: Yeah blah blah blah.

We talked more.

The drinks were gone and she mentioned at least once in the conversation that she had to go put money in the meter for her car. I didn’t buy.

Me: Its so cool meeting you its too bad I cant hang out with you any more.

Her: Why?

Me: I gotta take Mr Poop Home. He cant be out in this too long.

Her: Well you can walk with me back to my car if you want on the way.

Me: Ok Maybe. But you gotta win this bet first.

ENTER: Five questions.

Of course she lost and with all seriousness (well feigned seriousness) I said, “Pleasure meeting you.”

of course we talked a little more and that was all. I walked away and we never saw each other again.

The End.

Yeah right.

So the bill comes and I say, “Well I suppose I could walk with you to your car if you bought my Bloody Mary for me.” 🙂

She did.

She didn’t even put up a fake fight.

So I start more intrusive kino on the walk putting my hand around her back then pulling it away ala R.J. (Give em something they like then pull it away just when you think they like it. Leave em wanting more.)

Now comes Spontaneity. I ask her on the way, “Are you Spontaneous?”

HB: Yea, blah blah blah.

and soon we’re at her car. I again remind her I gotta take Poop home but she had already said she wanted to have another drink somewhere so I said, “Why dont you ride with me and we can drop him off and come back?” She said OK.

She puts money in the meter and my brain says, “Kiss her NOW!”

My old self started saying, “Too early” but I knew What I had to do no matter how silly the timing seemed or how I didnt think we were there yet.

I did the Swingcat – Kissing School Routine.

I tried to kiss her and…

REJECTED!

however it was a good rejection.

HB: You cant kiss me. Im not that easy.
Me: What happened to all that spontaneity?
HB: Im not that spontaneous.
Me: So you have rules… Real spontaneous. What are your Rules? (David X)
HB: I dont have any rules.
Me: You didnt just kiss me that seems like a rule to me.
HB: I just met you Im not easy. Im not that spontaneous.

Keep in mind we’re walking to my car and Im not drilling her, this is all light hearted.

We drive to my house and on the way I run Sexual Predators by TD (since Sonics has been on about how good it is.) Wait NO. Thats the car ride back. I cant remember what we talked about on the way.

Anyways the key to my house is this. David DeAngelo learned a trick from Riker I believe. Bring the chick to your place, let her in to feel comfortable or even wonder whats gonna happen next and then LEAVE right away.

We did but on the way out I went for the kiss again, My state was on and she denied me again, this time saying, “Besides. You didn’t steal a kiss.”

So I did! Short makeout like five seconds then I pulled away and said, “Thats all you get.”

HB: Thats all YOU get!  🙂

FRAMEs are so wonderful especially when you know you just stole hers from her.

Sexual Predators… Walking back my game was ON and she was done. It was FTW at this point. I pulled a Sonics “Lets see if we fit.” during the walk back to the new bar. She had taken to grabbing my ass.

OK Rewind:

My doorway after the second rejection she started touching my ass.

I’m like: Seriously? You can grab my ass but I cant kiss you?

Thats when she said, “Yea but you didn’t Steal a kiss.” Instructing me exactly what she wanted me to do.

Fast Forward:

The bar – Sexual State – ppl were noticing. She started asking me from time to time, “Where did you come from?”

The bartender chick at one point tried to AMOG me when we were kissing with something about, “Do you have enough to go around?”

Me: What you wanna kiss?
BT: No I mean you got enough of her to go around? (Im sure she realised she just walked into something with someone she didnt want to walk into it with – she mustve heard the response I was thinking right at that moment because before I had a chance to answer she Switched gears) Besides there’s children in here.

Me: If I ran this country there I would teach these kids how to learn this stuff early. Wouldnt you want guys to be better a this stuff?
BT: Id vote for ya! Don’t you hate it when you try to kiss a guy and you have to teach him what to do? (to HB. I win again.) She went on like this for a couple mins and it just made me look even better.

Routine: Me: (My own) Im a big fan of the HighSchool make out. Its a lost art. You know how when you were in highschool you could just get together and make out all heavy for hours and you didn’t even care if it went anywhere. I love doing that, Im reviving it.

Shits on now.

We walk and Im barely talking now. I dont have to. Its all kino. PPL are looking at us, the spiky haired guy and the hot Burlesque chick (by the by – she is a Burlesque dancer and she is on Youtube.)

I remember that my Yoga Teacher had a Rock-Band going on at the Gym and I went to see. I social Proofed that place eyeing another target and standing there with this chick draped all over me and dancing on me like Im king Kool. The target I totally gave strong Eye contact opened me. “Arent you Poops Dad?”

We talked a merged set then after a minute my chick walked off to get a beer. Working my new target a little I blabbed about something and Just so happened to throw in, “So I was wandering around and I met her and…”

HBNaia: Wait! You mean the chick you’re all over? You just met her?
Me: Well shes kinda on me too, but yea. (my attitude was like, I don’t get it. Whats the big deal? Isnt that kinda thing normal?)

So we talked some more and I found out that she was gonna take the Naia Class at my Gym.

ME: You know I was actually gonna check out that class too.   Maybe I’ll see ya there.

Also at one point the older High Value (she just beams high value – some ppl just do) chick who manages the gym totally walks up to me and gives me huge props in front of my set and calls me cute and everything.

One more thing from the party. There was this girl from the gym; short, stocky-built, atheletic – cute as hell and even slightly muscular. I gamed her a little too.

When I said, Maybe Ill see you at the gym, she said, “Sure Im usually there working out with a guy named Bora.” as if to say, “I can see your game buddy and Ill be with another guy.”

Me: Really? You know Borat?!
Her: Bora
Me: Thats awesome, tell him I liked his movie.
Her: Its Bora
Me: Seriously. Borat works out here?

She started laughing and smiling and showed me a picture of the guy. With his name under it.

I ignored it and kept rambling about Borat and how I didnt think Borat looked like he worked out.

__________________
So I said after a lull in the action, “Let’s walk.” and started walking. (HBSproket again) and the Yoga chick who has eyes for me sees me leave in the middle of her song and I flash her the peace sign.

We walk a block and I direct HBSproket around the block back the way we came and into an alley. We find one of those enclosed Doorways and I direct her in there and we make out and are pushing each other against the wall and switching dominant roles and getting each other generally Horny.

This goes on for a few and again shes asking me, “Where did you come from?”

We walk some more and happen upon the next enclosed doorway and SHE pushes me in there and more make out and mock Shtooping.

Back to the party for a bit then back to my house.

We walk back to our cars so she can follow me to my house to “watch Borat” since we joked about it and then I asked her if she ever saw the movie.

We drove to my house and she wanted me to play a CD she had so I did. She starts Stripper lap dancing me and she can fucking MOVE. I literally felt like I was getting a lap dance in a strio club in my own home.

Thre was definately more Push and Pull going on – For instance – Earlier before we decided to go back to my house She said, “Lets not plan anything, lets just go with the flow.”

I read somewhere – maybe even here recently someones idea on how to counter that so I stole it – if you read this and its you give yourself credit below and thanks.

I said, “It’s ok. We dont have to have sex.”

It somehow blew here state a little and she made this sad face but then the deal was sealed and she was back at my house.

Anyways later on we stopped the makeout and lap dancing for a while and I decided that instead of going in for the *close right away I would put it off. So we went into the computer room and played with Myspace.

Then after a bit she was pulling me back onto her and soon I just sorta took my penis out and we went from there.

She started rubbing it and then says, “If only you had some lubrication I could stroke it better.”

Gee look! I just happen to have some left!  🙂

So it went on and on from there.

Plus afterwords I gave her a spanking, like Seriously. She wanted me to call her bad girl and all that. God that was fun.

Im trying to discover the LMR but I have said in the past I just dont really ever get that much LMR when I close a chick. I have a natureal tendancy to be good at push so now that Ive added the pull and am getting better all the time its pretty much constant until the close. Up until the point I closed her there was always that, “We dont have to do this tonight – or Thats all youre getting” mentality.

After the interaction was in its closing phase she commented, “I knew you would be like this! I’m glad I met you.”

I asked (being ever on the quest for knowledge) “When did you know?”

She said, “As soon as I saw you I knew.”

I was like, “Yea but when I first talked to you you didn’t say much.”

She replied, “Yea but you kept talking.”

“So what would have happened had I not talked to you or stopped talking after you kinda brushed me off?” I asked her?

She said, “I would have kept walking.”

I said, “Really just like that? You wouldn’t have even tried talking to me?”

“Nope,” she answered me simply, “You’re the man.”

What fun!

Questions? Comments? You still awake?