A Radical Approach to Learning Game REALLY Fast

I wanted to introduce you to another ‘partner in crime’ if you will.  His name is Mercutio.  He’s on a pretty advanced level of his game so he can see the insights (Matrix, if you will) and break shit down.  I think he and I have totally different styles of game but the thing is, we are both very good at what we do.  But the point is, I love spreading different ideas of what works.  The way, in my opinion, to really get good is to take what works for you from different guys and build your own badass skillset.

I plan on having Mercutio write a guest article (or 2) in the future for my blog, but for now, I thought THIS particular post was too valuable to NOT post.  So, check it check it out.  Enjoi. ~Ronnie

Themesong:

A Radical Approach to Learning Game REALLY Fast

« on: February 13, 2013, 03:05 PM »

As some of you know, I’ve been learning french. Kinda a necessity here in France lol.

My opinion — learning a language and game at the same time will get you good at game about 4 times faster, and help you reach a higher level than you would without it.

Did you know that your 3rd or 4th language is about 3-4 times easier to learn than you 2nd? People who learn Esperanto and then another language are better at that other language than people who took only that language. It SEEMS like a waste of time to learn Esperanto, but the fact is the mental framework of how to mentally EXIST in another reality has been created, and now it is easy to learn another language. And in a way, GAME is learning how to exist and think in another reality.

I think the struggles of learning a language would DRASTICALLY benefit most game noobs, bc they have so much of the same learning elements. It will streamline your learning process and help you avoid A LOT of the pitfalls of learning game. Plus, at the end of it, you will be really good with women AND bilingual.

Similarities:

– It’s something that you at first think is IMPOSSIBLE. You are almost afraid to try.

– People think people just have some ‘talent’ that they are born with for it. ‘I just don’t have the ‘gift”. Or they think that if you didn’t learn it by a certain age, you are doomed.

– Starting conversations is EXTREMELY uncomfortable at first. There is REAL FEAR there. At every moment, you will want to escape (to revert to english, or to go back to drinking beer and talking about game with your wings instead of approaching). But I promise you, that is the direction of success. There is no other way to speak a language than to speak a language — you have to jump in sometime, and it is always scary at first.

– There is a ‘fake’ success level. This is hugely important. Ever met someone that claims they can speak English, but then you talk to them and they are like ‘no, you no go there’ or ‘yes, me do that’? Yeah, we can understand them, but its not fluent. But they THINK they are fluent. SAME WITH GAME. There’s a lot of guys out there that are getting laid kinda often by kinda attractive girls — just enough for them to think that they are ‘fluent’. But the truth is, there is always a lot more room for improvement, and when you are fluent, you will KNOW it. The success is like a dam breaking.

The FIELD is KING. A LOT more people can write french than can speak it live. Well, there’s a LOT of people that can write about how to get girls, but can’t do it live either. You can study grammar and vocabulary all day, but if you aren’t out there practicing with REAL LIVE people, you will not be fluent. Plus you will learn to follow the field over theory… if the natives are using this slang now, it doesn’t matter what your fucking book is telling you… that slang is the truth. This will often conflict with the ‘keyboard theorists’, who will hate you, but you should trust your field experience.
-A corollary to this is to ‘follow the pro’s’ — if a native says it like that, it’s probably right. If you see a guy who gets girls do it and get laid, it probably works too.

-A focus on an actual GOAL. My goal in french is not to be the guy that knows every single vocabulary word, or the guy who knows all the grammar rules. My goal is to be able to communicate fluently.
Same with game — your goal in game should not be to be the guy that knows every single theory of every single coach out there, but to be the guy that is absolutely awesome in the field and pulls hot girls. That is the only goal. Stop giving a shit about being well respected on the forum, or being seen as a future ‘coach’ and be the guy that performs extremely well , and you will get everything in the process. If you learn a language at the same time as game, this truth will be self-evident and the lesson will translate across to your game learning without you even thinking about it.

-The more you learn, the more you learn. It’s a J-curve. In the beginning, progress will be brutally slow. You will want to give up. Nothing is coordinated, and you don’t know enough words to make it through basically any sentence. In starting game, you will know a little, but likely not enough to make it through sets successfully. But then this all changes. The more you learn, the more you open the door to learning more. You will be better at speaking, so more people will be willing to speak with you, so you learn more. You aren’t getting shot down off the bat, so your sets last 5-10 mins, instead of 15 seconds. There is a CLEAR tipping point in game, where all of a sudden momentum is on your side and you know enough to REALLY start to learn more.

– Just like a language, game is something that once you are good at it, you don’t even have to THINK about. You almost forget you know it, or how incredibly much you actually know. It’s immensely frustrating for someone who knows it to try and teach someone who doesn’t, bc its just instinctive. It’s like ‘oh shit, you don’t know what ‘triangle’ means?’ ‘I dunno why, it just SOUNDS right, that would work’. ‘How could you have thought that girl DIDN’T like you — she was giving you the sign to take her home!!’
– At the same time, its also REALLY annoying to be fluent, and have someone who isn’t correct you on how to do it bc they read it in a book.

– It’s like a subscript that is running without you even knowing it. Just like how in French I am translating into English without even thinking, in game I am translating into meaning the same way, instantly and instinctively. ‘Ahh, that move was too needy’ ‘That guy is being too chill — that’s gotta be her husband’ etc…

-It gets “quicker” – remember how Mystery said at first game is just racing by you, but then later it just slows down. Same with a language — at first you are overwhelmed, you’re like ‘I CAN’T THINK THAT FAST!!!’ Then like three weeks later, you are like, wow, holy shit, I have all this time to think.

– You have REALLY bad days, and REALLY good days. Some days, you feel like a king — you can understand like everything. Then there are days that you just can’t understand shit and you feel embarrassed. Learning a language will teach you patience.

– Teaches you how to avoid VAPOR-LOCK – this is what I call ‘I am thinking too much, I don’t know what to say’ syndrome. I fuck up ALL THE TIME in french, but it’s better to fuck it up and get the meaning across, than to pause and pause and pause while I compute all the grammar in order to say it perfectly. The lesson from this is to keep what you have running in your mind decently light and not overload your mental capacities. Now, still strive to improve, but in the field, you need to be able to flow and allow mistakes.

– Teaches you to be consistent a little at a time. Just a little bit of practice each day will make a huge difference.

– It is easily maintained, but you lose it decently quick if you let it rot — every guy on this forum has had great game at one point in time, then got a gf, then broke up and had to re-learn some shit. It doesn’t take a lot to keep yourself in tip-top shape, always practice your game even if you wouldn’t actually follow through on it.

Anyways, there’s a lot more. But I honestly, honestly, honestly, think every newb should learn a language at the same time they are learning game. The principles cross over perfectly, and you will have learned how to learn game in a very efficient manner that will make I think will cut your learning time down by at least half, likely more. Plus, you will be bilingual, which is fucking awesome. Btw, knowing even just an ounce of another language in America is an instant deal-sealer with any girl that speaks it. My french gets me laid in America by girls that can speak even a basic level — plus it gives us an inside conspiracy element. With spanish, you will have to know more to be impressive, but if you know even 300 words in Russian, you will get laid at least twice a year in River North with Eastern Europeans, Ukrainians, and Russians.

-Merc

How do you think this can improve your overall skillset with women?

Do you have ideas or thoughts to add to this and share?  I would like to hear them.

Want to know more about Mercutio?  Stay Tuned.

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Empathy, Emotional Intelligence, and Being Normal

Ladies and Gentlemen, I did not write this post.  I stole it from a cat and cohort in the world of seduction that I mentioned before in one of my posts, namely “Sometimes I Just Want to Play Video Games”.  This post is directed at men, but in general has information that is phenomenal in my opinion for both men and women or anyone else interested in dating… (shrugging my shoulders)…  Anyway, here we go!

Themesong:

Empathy, Emotional Intelligence, and Being Normal by James Amoureux

This last week got me thinking about how some people are so socially unaware that it impairs not just their luck with the ladies but their ability to function as “hyou-man bee-ings” at all.

An ex-girlfriend (let’s call her Mona) is husband shopping so she decided to turn to the internet and meet guys. She’s much too hot for this, but she’s so painfully shy and awkward around strangers, and she has no interest in fixing this, that she figures eHarmony and Match.com are better ways to land a man. She’s right BTW–if you want something more casual use POF or OK Cupid. Avoid craigslist. Yuck.

I help her sort out her screening criteria, fill in the profile, etc. because if she’s going to do this she might as well do it right. (For the record, I’m an equal opportunity advisor. I’m not on the side of the one with the dick. Guys should become the kind of men women crave, and girls should become the kind of women men deserve. Everything I do is meant to make guys and girls mutually happy.)

Anyway she met a guy (let’s call him Paul) she really clicked with and things were going great for a month or so. She’s mid-20s and he’s late 30s. His family thinks she’s great and vice-versa. So far so good.

Things get semi-serious and they go to an anniversary celebration for Paul’s parents and after saying their goodnights they leave the banquet area for their hotel room. They’ve both had a few drinks. When she gets to the bathroom she finds that her diamond stud is missing, so she says she’s going to retrace her steps to look for it. “No don’t worry I’ll get you a new one.” Fine, she says, and they start making out. After a bit he says, “By the way how much do you think a pair of earrings like that costs?” About $100 she tells him. “Oh bullshit! That’s like a $20 stud. Don’t you try to screw me!”

Some background about Paul: He’s loaded, his family’s loaded, and he’s divorced. His ex-wife soaked him for alimony so now he’s a jaded by gold-digging hoes and lying bitches. While his soreness is understandable, he seems to insist on casting Mona as a gold digger and a lying bitch. He seems to subscribe to this idea of collective responsibility that is he punishes this particular woman for the wrongs committed by some other woman and thus figures “all women are (name your slur).”

Mona told him then and there, “Hey I don’t appreciate that!” He blew it off and they went to sleep. That little remark shitcanned the evening and the next few days were tense, as he kept snarking with offhanded comments about “taking my money” and “screwing me over,” even though he tried to make it come across jokingly. Rather than defend herself she just kind of withdrew.

Now my inner Machiavellian says, “Hey if treating a girl like a bitch works, then go for it.” Here’s how it worked for him: after they got back from the anniversary weekend she “ran into an old fling” and started hooking up with him. Now she likes Paul despite how he treated her, because she sees qualities in him that turn her on (Type-A, go-getter, overconfident). But she has enough self-respect that she’ll walk away from abuse at this point. She’s not an insecure 20 year old anymore, and she’s looking for a relationship that can go somewhere.

She tells him to fuck off and for a month they don’t see each other. He persists, she relents, and eventually they catch up. Things are better but there’s still these snarky remarks about money that come up. (Think this guy has trust issues?) So figuring that he may be worth investing in, she takes my advice and delivers a very simple I-statement:

You know Paul, I feel insulted and abused when you make those snarky comments because it suggests you think I’m gold digging, and I’d like you to stop. If you don’t like me for me, that’s fine but if you treat me with contempt just because I’m around I’m not interested in seeing you.

She told me when she said this, it’s like a little gear clicked in Paul’s head. He hadn’t thought of it like that. He had, honest and true, thought that talking to her like she’s one of “dem bitches and greedy hoes” would somehow not affect her. He was just plain oblivious about how he came off.

As we talk about this I think about Paul, I think about my buddy in Florida who is having trouble connecting with women, I think about this guy I know who amps up the attraction but gets pissed and doesn’t understand why a girl who is otherwise down to fuck won’t come back to his place on the spot. The pervasive lack of empathy and absence of emotional intelligence is so common among America adult males that it’s almost the new normal (see http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=what-me-care).

I make this claim: empathy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy) and emotional intelligence(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_intelligence) are required to create a genuine connection with another person. Further, having excellent emotional awareness may not get you more pussy; however the lack of emotional smarts will ruin your experiences with women more often than not. It may not be enough, but without it you’re most likely pissing up a rope. Or you’re struggling to fuck girls you’ll never see again because they don’t “connect” with you–you two have no awareness of each other emotionally.

However emotional intelligence (also called EQ) can be learned. Being able to step into the shoes of another person and appreciate their subjective world takes work, but you can get better at it. EQ is mostly studied in psychology and business/management circles and you can take EQ assessments online (http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_page/index.htm?idRegTest=3037 among other places). The purpose of the assessment is to determine your current emotional intelligence, not to judge you as a whole person. Don’t let the assessment define you; let it inform you.

This isn’t about being a sensitive new-age pussy. It’s about being aware of and in control of your emotions rather than letting them control you (approach anxiety much?). In broad terms, EQ helps you:

* Understand your own emotional state to manage stress and anxiety
* Understand the emotional state of other people, to manage their stress and anxiety
* Communicate productively about personal or volatile issues
* Relate to people on their own terms, avoiding tedious miscommunication

If Paul had better EQ he would have seen that Mona was seriously offended by his insinuations that she was out for his money. Florida guy would recognize that he needs to spark a woman’s passion to feel (literally, fucking feel) a connection. Attraction guy would recognize that DTF girls can’t act on their feelings without a sense of safety and security.

With better EQ you “get” people. Your flakes go away. Life is better for everyone.

Ready for the sales pitch?

Well I don’t have a TantraLogic “Quit Being A Fucking Sociopath Already”TM 27 Hour DVD Set but smarter people than me have given this proper treatment. So if you want you can read these books to learn more:

Emotional Intelligence for Dummies
The EQ Edge

Because the more emotionally savvy you are, the better you’ll do with the HU-MAN BE-INGS, including the FEMALES OF THE SPECIES.

Remember, if the women don’t find you handsome they should at least find you handy. Learn how people operate emotionally. Get in a woman’s head so you can get your hand down her pants.

James

You can find more of James at:

http://tantralogic.com
http://facebook.com/tantralogic

And of course his book:

How to Start a Kinky Relationship

17 Reasons To Ignore Everybody and Follow Your Dreams

Former basketball player Michael Jordan

Image via Wikipedia

“What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I just had my first piece of press written about the Roller Coaster Tour thanks to the Muskegon Chronicle! Muskegon is where I’m beginning the tour so I naturally contacted them first.

I got some interesting comments in regards to that article. On the whole the e-mails I received from new readers was positive. But one person said, “This is an incredible waste of resources. You should be doing X instead of this.”

Instead of responding and kicking him off his high horse I trashed the message. Those of us who are doing what we want with our lives will always run into naysayers, doubters, and people who think they know better. It’s the crabs in a bucket phenomenon.

Yesterday I read an article on All of Us Revolution (Kristin and Shannon are launching an organic, fair trade, sustainable clothing line!) where they were talking about the “noes” they receive. When they get a “no” they turn to each other and say “yes.” That’s a great attitude. When you’re going after something big lots of people will tell you “no.” Sometimes you’re the only one telling yourself “yes” and that’s OK. Know that you’re in good company.

Yesterday I also talked to my friend Kenny about someone telling him “no, that’s not gonna happen” in regards to him playing Michael Jordan 1 on 1. Later he got a phone call that was a massive “YES!” in the right direction. Maybe the biggest “yes” he has received since beginning his journey.

Nobody is immune to “no.” Preparing for the Roller Coaster Tour has been, in general, a fight against “no,” but I’ll save that for another day.

With that all said, here are 17 reasons you should follow your dreams:

  1. If you don’t follow your dreams you crush your dreams. Eventually you’ll stop dreaming altogether.
  2. There are very few things worse than regret. What will you regret tomorrow that you didn’t do today?
  3. Dreamers who took action have created everything around you.
  4. Following your dreams doesn’t always turn out as planned, but that makes them even more memorable.
  5. Personal growth happens when you stretch yourself. If you don’t follow your dreams you’re not stretching.
  6. You want to be remembered. Everybody does. We remember those who follow their dreams.
  7. Doing what you want attracts haters. This gives you a change to ignore them. They hate that more than anything. Keep doing what you do. (In case that wasn’t clear: Don’t ever engage haters. It’s not worth your time. Let them be losers.)
  8. Your dreams and your actions define you. If you do what others tell you to do then you’re letting them define you.
  9. Following your dreams gives you the opportunity to Ignore Everybody.
  10. When people who look up to you see you following your dreams it will inspire some of them to follow their dreams.
  11. When people who don’t even know you see you following your dreams it will inspire some of them to follow their dreams as well. (<– This is one of the reasons I write publicly on this website.)
  12. Following your dreams makes you interesting.
  13. You learn a lot from failure. Since you will fail on your path you’ll learn a lot too.
  14. Someone who’s motivated to accomplish something great is instantly sexier.
  15. There are no rules in life so why limit yourself to what everybody else is doing?
  16. You might live forever, but you might also die tomorrow. Take a chance.
  17. It’s better than watching TV.

I’m gonna continue following my crazy dreams. How about you?

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Sidecar:

Always give credit where credit is due.  I stole this article from it’s author.  Find out how you can steal his stuff too by checking out his blog on Freedom, Health, Travel, and Life:

Ridiculously Extraordinary by Karol Gadja

Enjoi